Posted by: Brian | 2009-10-11


I am sure you have answered this question 1000 times. The responses I have found are all good, but just a bit short of what I am looking for.

I am a 54 year old white male, married for 25 years. I was overweight with hypertension, and on Almoc / Ziak / Prexum. I have lost most of my excess weight (About 30 kgs over 12 months), and now only on Ziak 2,5 g and Amloc 2,5 mg. Blood pressure down to 120/80. Doctor is considering taking me off last of the BP tablets.

About 2 year ago I started with ED problems on occasion. The doc put me on 50mg Viagra. Once I lost weight I needed the Viagra less and less and went 6 months with no problems, having sex two to three times a week. When problems reoccur I go back on 25mg Viagra until my confidence is back, and then no longer use the tablets.

The problem, when it happens is most frustrating for myself, but especially for my wife. I normally have strong erections and strong orgasms. When the problem reoccurs, there is normally no problem getting an erection –  especially during foreplay. The problem will suddenly present itself about 20 to 30 seconds after penetration. This is also normally after becoming very wet during foreplay.

The sudden losing of the erection seems to me to be caused by one of two things. The first is I sometimes think of the importance or orgasm for myself to please my wife who would normally have an orgasm at the same time. As I think of this –  I loose the erection. I assume this is “ performance anxiety.”  ? It is no good saying –  do not think of it, because that just puts on more pressure. It is also no good to say try have sex without the goal being to have orgasm. I doubt my wife would feel comfortable knowing from the start that it was planned to end without orgasm.

The second sensation that I sometimes feel is when I am very wet when penetrating. Suddenly the erection is lost. It almost feels like I have ejaculated without having an orgasm. Again very frustrating. Is this a form of premature ejaculation ?

In both cases, if I have taken Viagra beforehand, it is normally possible to achieve an erection again about 30 minutes later –  and finish the job. As you can imagine my wife is not very impressed with doing this- but t is better than leaving both of us very frustrated.

A couple of questions

a) What can you recommend generally ?

b) Is either of the blood pressure tablets having any effect on the ED ?

c) Should I talk further with my doctor, or should I ask him to refer me to a urologist ?

d) Am I suffering from Performance anxiety ?

e) If so –  what recommendation are there for performance anxiety ?

f) Am I suffering from Premature Ejaculation ?

g) Is there any medication that can be taken in conjunction with the Viagra to solve the Premature Ejaculation ?

h) Is being on Viagra at 54 normal ?

Help would really be appreciated, as it is driving myself and my wife crazy

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageAgeing and Sexuality expert

Generally I recommend you visit a urologist. There is always need for further investigation once a man presents with a sexual change/symptom. Of course you have performance anxiety (PA) but that is a secondary result of your ED. And with no disrespect to your wife, her vocal frustration is adding to your PA.
You need a full medical examination- yes your blood pressure meds do interfere with erections but if it is under control, as your is, then this will not be primary cause of ED.
You need your sex hormones checked - blood tests- you need your thyroid checked as well as prostate exam done. It sounds as if you have lost control of your ejaculatary ability. You just don't know when its happening. These tests will give you some answers to this.
Taking Viagra is very safe once your doctor has proved you a good candidate for this drug.
Once you know if there is or is not an underlying pathology, your urologist can go ahead and treat your ED. Right now stop all penetration and find other wonderful ways of playing with each other. This will provide you both needed relief from PA.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2009-12-14

im a 53 yr old man whos been married 31 yrs. i suffer from pre-ejaculation because of not having to stop myself from coming as my wife prefurs to have a clitoral orgasm. in other words we would make love normaly ie foreplay etc and then when she was ready i would rub her clitoris untill she orgasmed.this was fine as i could kiss her, watch her while fondling her with my other free hand,(with no preasure). the down side to this is that after orgasming i would have to wait about a minute or two for her to recover and then proceed with entering her. by then the atitude would be please hurry and lets get it over and done with.
this meant that i didnt have to try and be the man and do the endurance thing. it meant just enter and soon it became like a routine thing and end up orgasming after 2 or three strokes.
31 yrs later im now on blood preasure tablets, and i still have the will to go at anytime. but i battle to get it hard and to stay hard. i still ejaculate just as quick.
can you help me and can i take some kind of viagra while on ziak 2.5 or is there something else i can do

Reply to anon
Posted by: Mike | 2009-11-16

My question is.....why do I just not feel horny....up until the age of 39 I was horny every day and had to sort myself out (wasn' t married or in a serious relationship) or else I felt horny all day long. Since then over the past few years I just do not feel horny and I miss it, my erections are' nt as good and I need physical touch to achieve a decent erection, whereas before if you' re feeling horny and a sexy moment occurs the erection would just happen. Any thoughts?

Reply to Mike
Posted by: Nancy | 2009-11-12

I' m a 43 year old women .. was married for 21 years to a man my age, the sex was ok-ish .. did not know any better .. but during the last 5 / 6 years, we had sex once or twice a year. I did not care as I am on blood pressure tabs and it affected my libido and because he did not seem to want it either it never caused any arguments. I' ve been divorced for 18 months, have met an amazing man, 10 years older. He is so passionate and loving, I did not know how good sex could be and we love being with each other ... i have multiple orgasms and he enjoys my body as much as I enjoy his. We cant get enough of each other and it is just awesum!

Reply to Nancy
Posted by: Anon | 2009-11-11

I am a 45 year old female and I find having sex at this age much better than when I was 25.

My ex did not find me good enough in bed and was bedhopping from one bed to another, but he has no idea what he is missing out on right now so its his loss....gie,gie,gie... I have a permanent sleeping partner and he smiles all day long after having a steaming hot romp in the bed with me. My sex drive is at its highest and I can carry on for hours, having orgasm after orgasm, which actually surprised me as well, but I enjoy every second of it. My partner is an excellent lover and I don' t know if this is part of what is happening with my body but he enjoys me having such a high sex drive because he is very high driven sexually himself and we enjoy each other all the time. So, no one is to old to have sex, it gets better and better with time.

Reply to Anon

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