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Question
Posted by: Kagiso | 2012/06/05

Dumbed because of having two kids

Hi Doctor, I lost because I met this amazing lady and was honest from the first day but sh later dmped me for having two kids.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Unfortunately, it's one of the penalties that arise when one has children outside of a continuing stable relationship - many people with whom you might otherwise have a happy relationship, are just not prepared to take on the responsibility of someone else's children. And she may worry, if you have had children with one or two other women, and left them, that for whatever reason, you're not yet skilled at creating lasting relationships, and that she too would lose you. And she may, reasonably, worry about the dramas the baby mama could cause, intruding on her relationship with you.

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6
Our users say:
Posted by: @Kagiso | 2012/06/05

Give us some meat, because as is your post is very dry. How long were you together? And is the babymama drama in chcek?

Give details, because i can tell you from personal experience that its no walk in the park dating a man with kids - I''m engaged to one. He has two, but i nearly left him because of the one babymama. And NOOOOO it wasnt her doing, it was him. He basically had one foot in and one foot out, AND that was the reason i felt i had to end it all - NOT becaue of the kids. Kids are lovely, its us (the adults) that are full of BS. He was maintaining a " civil"  relationship with her all the while telling me that it was over between them. Over - but she would call on fridays to say she''s coming over for the weekend. Over - but he was paying her cellphone bill. Over - but he was paying her retail accounts. Over - but he was paying for her petrol. Over - but HE WAS BASICALLY STILL HER MAN IN EVERY RESPECTS EXCEPT (MAYBE) SEX!!! So come out with the truth, there''s something you are not telling us.

Reply to @Kagiso
Posted by: @Edf | 2012/06/05

You are dof!!!!!!!!

Reply to @Edf
Posted by: edf | 2012/06/05

I only tell themabout my kidsafter I have bonked them at least 3 times FOR THE SAME SAME REASON. They say ..." we don''t want baby mamma drama" ....and I say I want kukurama drama

Reply to edf
Posted by: Romany | 2012/06/05

the lady is an independent, free thinking, mature woman.
You cannot blame her for this.
She obviously wants her own life and own family without someone else''s baggage.
You will find another lady. Maybe also with children of her own? That will be better for you as she will understand better.

Reply to Romany
Posted by: maybe... | 2012/06/05

if it''s with 2 different women, she is probably thinking, if he can impregnate and leave 2 women, what makes her special? or maybe she is just thinking ahead...the life she will leave with you, bargage from the past, maintaining two kids. what kind of life/future would you have have...fear of the unknown...but talk to her, understand her thinking if she meant that much to you

Reply to maybe...
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/06/05

Unfortunately, it's one of the penalties that arise when one has children outside of a continuing stable relationship - many people with whom you might otherwise have a happy relationship, are just not prepared to take on the responsibility of someone else's children. And she may worry, if you have had children with one or two other women, and left them, that for whatever reason, you're not yet skilled at creating lasting relationships, and that she too would lose you. And she may, reasonably, worry about the dramas the baby mama could cause, intruding on her relationship with you.

Reply to cybershrink

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