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Question
Posted by: Anon | 2012/10/04

Drug abuse

My son, 27 jrs of age is not working, has a trust fund that provides income.
He uses drugs, is extremely aggressive and paranoid. He is living with me now but is making our lives miserable. I do not know how to deal with him. I want him to go for rehab &  psychological counseling, but he believes that he can help himself. I really want to help him but I am too emotional. Is there a way that he can be “ forced”  to get the necessary “ help” ?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

A trust fund can be useful, but often works best if there is a trustee to control and ensure its wise use. If it makes it unnecessary for this young man to work, and finances his drug habit, its entirely destructive rather than constructive. Why is he still living with you ? Why do you feel that despite his independent funding, he needs you to tolerate his drug habit ? Rad up about Tough Love. Drug addicts MUSt help themselves, for any realistic chance of recovery, but solely doing it themselves hardly ever works - they do need proper expert involvement.
As a legal adult, he is entitled to be foolish, and unless his mental state can be seriously considered a serious risk to his life or that of others, he can't be forced even to do what's good for him.
But while he chooses to live with you, its your house and your rules, and you could make his continuing to stay with you conditional upon him sincerely taking part min rehab and counselling, and getting and remaining clean of the drugs. If he chooses not to follow those conditions, he's free to do so, but would then need to find somewhere else to stay and support himself.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/10/04

A trust fund can be useful, but often works best if there is a trustee to control and ensure its wise use. If it makes it unnecessary for this young man to work, and finances his drug habit, its entirely destructive rather than constructive. Why is he still living with you ? Why do you feel that despite his independent funding, he needs you to tolerate his drug habit ? Rad up about Tough Love. Drug addicts MUSt help themselves, for any realistic chance of recovery, but solely doing it themselves hardly ever works - they do need proper expert involvement.
As a legal adult, he is entitled to be foolish, and unless his mental state can be seriously considered a serious risk to his life or that of others, he can't be forced even to do what's good for him.
But while he chooses to live with you, its your house and your rules, and you could make his continuing to stay with you conditional upon him sincerely taking part min rehab and counselling, and getting and remaining clean of the drugs. If he chooses not to follow those conditions, he's free to do so, but would then need to find somewhere else to stay and support himself.

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