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Question
Posted by: Motlalentwa | 2010/11/25

Drinking Habits

I committed to a woman and love her very much, the problem is she is always drinking alcohol and not supportive. She is unemployed and stays with his parents. I always struggle with things that she could take care of while at home but she is not interested. I have even proposed that she empower herself by going back to school. I am definitely sure that she is just sticking with me because of the financial support she gets from me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If she is helped by you and others to just sit around all day drinking, at your expense and that of others, what motivation can she have to change ? What on earth do you find loveable about someone like this ? Surely this sounds as though she is using you ( and "his ( or her? ) parents" ). Move on with your own life, rather than helping her to become a better alcoholic and parasite.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Phoenix | 2010/11/25

don''t expect people to understand what you are going through here my friend - trust me!

When you love someone - you don''t care whether they are employed, educated or not but i think you should speak to your girlfriend that she must make herself useful when it comes to you needing help - be calm about it and you will see the change! be patient with her as well.

Good luck

Reply to Phoenix
Posted by: Purple | 2010/11/25

If someone else provides everything for you and you just need to sit home and accept it, there''s no incentive to make things better.
Stop the financial support and see what happens, that will show her true character.

If she already has a drinking problem, that isn''t going to get better, so why bring such misery on yourself.

Am I misunderstanding or is she living with some other guys parents? That would be a get out of there fast clue to me.

Reply to Purple
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/11/25

If she is helped by you and others to just sit around all day drinking, at your expense and that of others, what motivation can she have to change ? What on earth do you find loveable about someone like this ? Surely this sounds as though she is using you ( and "his ( or her? ) parents" ). Move on with your own life, rather than helping her to become a better alcoholic and parasite.

Reply to cybershrink

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