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Question
Posted by: Sparky | 2011-02-08

Down and Out

My partner is extremely down, so bad that I am afraid he will go into depression. He was a millionair 3 years ago, and due to greed, lost his companies. He went overseas and is now back with nothing. He is starting with nothing. He has so many ideas, and just as he thinks somehting is going to happen it slams closed in his face. He is 51 and tells me, if he wasn''t mentally strong and a fighter he would have been a hobo. He keeps trying, but I am sure his systemm is being warn down with all the negativity, and mostly becasue he has to rely on other people at the momen that keep breaking promises and meetings. I do believe he will be the businessman he wants was, but I need advice on how I can support him without putting more pressure and stress on him. We have an amazing sex life and the time we do spend togther I listen while he talks about what is going on. I don''t want to make it to obvious to him, but mentally in a suttle way support him. Please any advice will be so much appreciated. He is a good man going through a hard time.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

OK. Let's hope he has learned many valuable lessons, including the damages almost always caused by greed. Maybe some of the other people are afraid that failure is infgectious. Maybe having watched him make bad decisions and lose so much, they hesitate to listen to his new ideas, with no guarantee that they'll be better than his old, failed ideas.
If he is indeed becoming depressed, he needs to see at least a psychologist to work on the depression, and maybe also to sharpen his ability to avoid discouragement while becoming more realistic in his aims. Having many ideas isn't necessarily a good thing, unless they are workable, practical, profitiable good ideas.
Otherwise it sounds as though you are being usefully supportive

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Sparky | 2011-02-09

Thank you for your advice. He did mention he would make a good public speaker. Maybe I should puch that point a little harder. He was a little better last night, he is just extremely exhausted and stressed, but I am there for him. Thank you again.

Reply to Sparky
Posted by: Shelly | 2011-02-08

It seems as if he down because he lost his business and money, well that will make anyone feel that way. Are you financially stable? Just take him mind off it, by doing things with him or by making him feel as if you need him. He needs to be able to take over something, remember he was a business owner, probably respected...He needs that feeling again.

Maybe he can talk to other business people or future business people about what happen and how they should take care of what they have...even speak at schools, telling kids how he made it and lost it all... even write a book...

Reply to Shelly
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-02-08

OK. Let's hope he has learned many valuable lessons, including the damages almost always caused by greed. Maybe some of the other people are afraid that failure is infgectious. Maybe having watched him make bad decisions and lose so much, they hesitate to listen to his new ideas, with no guarantee that they'll be better than his old, failed ideas.
If he is indeed becoming depressed, he needs to see at least a psychologist to work on the depression, and maybe also to sharpen his ability to avoid discouragement while becoming more realistic in his aims. Having many ideas isn't necessarily a good thing, unless they are workable, practical, profitiable good ideas.
Otherwise it sounds as though you are being usefully supportive

Reply to cybershrink

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