Our expert says:
In some ways it wakes two people who know each other well, and love each other, to argue strongly. Older people ( you don't mention her age ) can become more tactless and abrasive as they age. And their comments are often hurtful when they don't expect them to be, or more hurtful than they mean. Over 60 she's unlikely to change, so toleration could be wise on your side --- and remember, if you're walking down the street and a dog barks at you, you don't feel hurt or personally insulted --- dogs bark, and feel better for barking, and you were in the right place to give them an opportunity to bark. It's not about you
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