Posted by: Anonymous | 2009-05-12

dont have the staying power

Hi. There seems to be a trend that I’ m starting to follow. Whenever I get a bf, other men just flock towards me. This confuses me and I start thinking that maybe I will be more compatible with one of them. As soon as my bf and I have problems, I want out and do not have the staying power to make it work. With so many options that I have, I just feel that why waste time on someone that you are not compatible with. Is this part of the dating game or do I have some kind of commitment phobia? I have tried to stay single for a couple of months to figure myself out, but it doesn’ t work. There is always someone out there wanting to go out with me. I know this might come across as shallow, but it is confusing me as I really need to start settling down with one guy. How can I change my outlook and give a relationship 100%, without looking for someone more compatible all the time? If this carries on, I will never get married. Thanks for reading.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Guys, PLEASE use other nicknames than Anonymous, it gets needlessly confusing.
This is not about compatibility --- it's about feeling more desirable than you are ( being fickle is undesirable ) as soon as you attract male atention. Yes, it doe acome across as shallow --- no as a rude comment, but because relationships you can pick up and drop so readily ARE shallow relationships. Counselling could help you identify what does and should matter most for you within relaionships, and how to look for it --- and especially how to then stick with it when other men come flocking like moths around a flame, atracted by your endless desirability

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