Posted by: Dean | 2009-03-05

Don' t know what to do anymore

Hey guys, my wife tells me that sex is not important to her and that it is not important in our marriage therefore she don' t wanto have sex.I have tried talking to her about my needs but she just keep turning it around that I must look after her needs (emotional) and that is it. I have tried everything, books, talking about it, pills etc. but this is causing our marriage to fall apart, but she don' t seem to think so cause according to her sex is the last thing in a marriage. What can I do?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

So many couples experience this problem. Men feel emotionally connected when they have sex and women need to feel emotionally connected to open herself up to having sex! We are wired differently. Go to the SASHA website - and click on "Sex Therapy" then click on the "Relationship Exercises" at the top of the page. Doing these together can help you discover how to best meet each others needs. If you neglect this, a cycle of 'distance' will continue which can negatively affect your long term relationship.

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Our users say:
Posted by: dug | 2009-03-06

Dean you are not alone. It sound like you are married to the same woman as I am.
If you find the solution, let me know.

Reply to dug
Posted by: Dean | 2009-03-05

I love my wife very much and want to have amazing sex with only her, we have a great relationship otherwise, it is just the sex issue, in the beginning it was awesome, now I feel rejected and unloved, I have chatted to her about it and she keeps telling me that sex is not important, but it is, how can I convince her, I love her very much, but do not wanto be this unhappy and feel this sexually frustrated for the rest of my life. I need to know what to maybe say or do to make her realize it is important .....

Reply to Dean
Posted by: MR | 2009-03-05

RUN!!! far away... Unless you are too attached. Explain to her that you will end up looking for it somewhere else...

Reply to MR
Posted by: TJ | 2009-03-05

and they cry when we have affairs ???its always the mans fault we the ones that never understand ...well explain why after some serious sexy years all of a sudden they dont feel like ity anymore ???

Reply to TJ
Posted by: T | 2009-03-05

Intimacy is most definately very important in a relationship. Even psychologists agree that having a healthy sexual relationship, is half the battle won, in a troubled relationship.
No advice to be given from my side, as I am very active in my relationship with my husband.
It can' t be easy for you, I can' t go for more than 2days without, and I am female!
Good luck

Reply to T
Posted by: Joe | 2009-03-05

was that the case before you where married ? if not then there is a problem Dean

Reply to Joe

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