advertisement
Question
Posted by: Amy | 2011/05/31

Dogter 3 met bottel

Goeie dag en byvoorbaat dankie vir die hulp.
Ek weet nie of dit regtig ''n probleem is waarmee u my kan help nie maar ek is raadop.
My dogtertjie is 3jaar oud. SY was al op 2jaar van haar doeke af en drink al van 5maande nie meer in die nag bottel nie. Sy drink ook glad nie ''n bottel voor sy gaan slaap nie. Die probleem is sy weier om by die huis uit enige iets anders as haar bottel te drink. By die vorige dagmoeder waar sy was, het ek later uitgevind dat toe ek haar van die bottels probeer af kry het, het hulle as sy geweier het om uit ''n koppie te drink haar mond oop geforseer en dan die melk/sap in haar mond gegooi. By haar nuwe skool drink sy glad nie bottel nie. Maar my probleem is by die huis. Ek het verlede jaar probeer om die bottels net weg te vat en sy het toe vir amper ''n week NIKS gedrink nie. Ek het toe noodgedwonge dit terug gegee. Moet my asb. nie kruisig nie. EK het al alles probeer. Verskeie ander bekertjies, mooi praat ens. Hoe moet ek maak?

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Later there may be useful comments here from the oher expert moms who regularly visit the forum, and you might also find it useful to post on the H24 Parenting forum.
There are complex psychological explanations, but young children at times get unduly attached to some objects, usually a blanket or furry toy, and insist, even though it grows dirty and unpleasant to us, on dragging it around with them, using it as a comforter, a source of re-assurance. Maybe this is what has happened to your child's bottle, and it isn't really about drinking as such.
Any child caregiver such as you describe, who forces a child's mouth open, etc., is being criminally abusive, and should have been charged and investigated by Child Welfare authorities.
Among other efects, she may have felt all the more strongly about drinking from the bottle as a result of being forced not to do so. Interesting that this is NOT a problem at her new school ( I hope the old one was closed down !)
It might be worth stopping attempts to directly encourage her not to drink from the bottle at home. Rather praise her lavishly for how clever and Big she is to drink from the cups when at school ; emphasize how proud you are to hear that she does this so cleverly, like a big girl. Mention how you'd love to see how well she can do this, and that you'll gladly provide a cup for her to drink from, when she's ready to do so.
In other words, look for small ways in which she is nearly doing what you want, and praise and reward that, and largely ignore it when she does what you don't prefer. Don't make a fuss when the drinks from a botle, but try to avoid giving her attention and affecion while she does so, giving it to her when she doesn't do so. Don't press a cup on her, but have it around, and maybe ask her to choose each time you ofer a drink.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

6
Our users say:
Posted by: Car:)line | 2011/06/01

I got my daughter to give her bottles to father christmas, (easter bunny, tooth fairy) to give to needy babies in exchange for another gift. Don''t fight about it. she has only been on earth for 3 years and is still very small. Peer pressure will take its course too. How many grade 1s have you seen with bottles? And many of them also drank bottles till the age of 5, I''m sure. This is not a fight worth fighting. To her, you wanting to take her bottle is like another woman wanting your husband. She is that attached and too small to understand that she has to separate when she is not ready. Don''t traumatise her or yourself. Dont listen to people who tell you she is too old. Do it at a pace that is comfortable for you and her. She has already been punished by her previous daymother and doesnt need to be bullied by more adults. Talk her into it until Christmas or her birthday. Read books about big girls so she can slowly identify. Good luck raising and loving your little person.

Reply to Car:)line
Posted by: Romany | 2011/05/31

As julle nou weer braai, motiveer haar om self die bottel/bottels in die vuur te gooi.

Reply to Romany
Posted by: Maria | 2011/05/31

Die ander ding is, moet haar nie dreig of smeek om te drink nie. Sit koeldrank / melk / water in die beker, maak seker sy weet waar dit is, en dan ignoreer jy haar net. As dit ''n magstryd tussen julle word gaan sy elke keer wen.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Maria | 2011/05/31

Probeer die Parenting forum, baie ma''s met raad daar.

Waaruit drink sy by die skool? Ek neem aan jy bedoel sy drink nog uit ''n bababottel met ''n tiet. Miskien kan jy probeer om dit aanvanklik te vervang met ''n " squeeze bottle" , met ''n tuit soos die Energade bottels.

Of jy kan vir haar sê  sy is nou ''n groot dogter, ''n ander baba het die bottels nodig. Neem haar winkel toe en laat sy ''n bekertjie of plastiekglas kies met ''n prentjie waarvan sy hou. Waarsku haar vir ''n paar dae dat ''n ander baba die bottels gaan kry, en dan vat jy dit eenvouding weg en bied net drinkgoed aan in haar beker/glas.

Sterkte!

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/05/31

Later there may be useful comments here from the oher expert moms who regularly visit the forum, and you might also find it useful to post on the H24 Parenting forum.
There are complex psychological explanations, but young children at times get unduly attached to some objects, usually a blanket or furry toy, and insist, even though it grows dirty and unpleasant to us, on dragging it around with them, using it as a comforter, a source of re-assurance. Maybe this is what has happened to your child's bottle, and it isn't really about drinking as such.
Any child caregiver such as you describe, who forces a child's mouth open, etc., is being criminally abusive, and should have been charged and investigated by Child Welfare authorities.
Among other efects, she may have felt all the more strongly about drinking from the bottle as a result of being forced not to do so. Interesting that this is NOT a problem at her new school ( I hope the old one was closed down !)
It might be worth stopping attempts to directly encourage her not to drink from the bottle at home. Rather praise her lavishly for how clever and Big she is to drink from the cups when at school ; emphasize how proud you are to hear that she does this so cleverly, like a big girl. Mention how you'd love to see how well she can do this, and that you'll gladly provide a cup for her to drink from, when she's ready to do so.
In other words, look for small ways in which she is nearly doing what you want, and praise and reward that, and largely ignore it when she does what you don't prefer. Don't make a fuss when the drinks from a botle, but try to avoid giving her attention and affecion while she does so, giving it to her when she doesn't do so. Don't press a cup on her, but have it around, and maybe ask her to choose each time you offer a drink.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/05/31

Later there may be useful comments here from the oher expert moms who regularly visit the forum, and you might also find it useful to post on the H24 Parenting forum.
There are complex psychological explanations, but young children at times get unduly attached to some objects, usually a blanket or furry toy, and insist, even though it grows dirty and unpleasant to us, on dragging it around with them, using it as a comforter, a source of re-assurance. Maybe this is what has happened to your child's bottle, and it isn't really about drinking as such.
Any child caregiver such as you describe, who forces a child's mouth open, etc., is being criminally abusive, and should have been charged and investigated by Child Welfare authorities.
Among other efects, she may have felt all the more strongly about drinking from the bottle as a result of being forced not to do so. Interesting that this is NOT a problem at her new school ( I hope the old one was closed down !)
It might be worth stopping attempts to directly encourage her not to drink from the bottle at home. Rather praise her lavishly for how clever and Big she is to drink from the cups when at school ; emphasize how proud you are to hear that she does this so cleverly, like a big girl. Mention how you'd love to see how well she can do this, and that you'll gladly provide a cup for her to drink from, when she's ready to do so.
In other words, look for small ways in which she is nearly doing what you want, and praise and reward that, and largely ignore it when she does what you don't prefer. Don't make a fuss when the drinks from a botle, but try to avoid giving her attention and affecion while she does so, giving it to her when she doesn't do so. Don't press a cup on her, but have it around, and maybe ask her to choose each time you ofer a drink.

Reply to cybershrink

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement