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Question
Posted by: curious | 2010/08/20

do men also need time to get over previous hurt (cheating girlfriend)

hi there,

do men also need time to get over previous hurtful relationship or is it just us girls that take so long?

my boyfriend and I started to date each other and he is not over the hurt of his previous relationship. he says he doesnt want me to be his rebound girlfriend so he has asked for some space to deal with the hurt. We were really crazy about each other the moment we met.

I have now said I will give him his space. Before anyone says he is just trying to get rid of me, it is not the case.

I have now not contacted him since he asked me for space. His work is also very demanding in such a way that we do not get to see each other a lot. He said it will die down a bit in a while.

He just cannot give me the 100% I deserve at the moment.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

HUMAN BEINGS need time to get over very painful expweriences. How long it takes depends on the nature of the relatonship, the nature of the break-up, and other factors, not the gender.
YOur new bf sounds sensible, and you are responding to his request very sensibly, too

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Popeye | 2010/08/24

yes men do need time to get over a previous love, we hurt just as much as women do.

Reply to Popeye
Posted by: curious | 2010/08/23

I am afraid that he will forget what we had when we dont see each other now.

Reply to curious
Posted by: curios | 2010/08/22

please Cybershrink, can you please advise me whether I can text him 3 weeks after he asked for space and just say I am thinking of him or should I wait for him to contact me?

Reply to curios
Posted by: curious | 2010/08/22

thank you all for your replies especially cybershrink. I think if he knew he would not give us a chance he would have told me so as he is a guy with integrity. he is quite an emotional guy.

Reply to curious
Posted by: Phil | 2010/08/22

Well Purple, from a guys perspective it is the girls that hook up way faster then the guys. Guys get replecaed in a flash!

But back to being realistic, Cybershrikns answer is spot on and 100% correct.There are exceptions in some HUMANS. -)

Reply to Phil
Posted by: Purple | 2010/08/20

I think (and I''m generalising here) that men and women deal with hurt in relationships differently. Women tend to rush off to their girlfriends, lick their wounds and show their hurt.
Men feel the same hurt but they go out to a club or a pub, grunt a bit while they drink beer and then ease the pain by transferring their affection to someone else.
Sorry, but it sounds like he''s just not that into you.
Generally, whether you are male or female, when you meet someone new and the first flashes of lust and excitement take over, the past hurt tends to take a back seat to the new fun.
Go, do your own thing, have fun. If he is being genuine, he''ll seek you out when he''s ready, but don''t put your life on hold while you wait for him to come around - which he might never do, or he might meet someone else and find that suddenly he''s able to committ to them just fine despite the hurt.

Reply to Purple
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/08/20

HUMAN BEINGS need time to get over very painful expweriences. How long it takes depends on the nature of the relatonship, the nature of the break-up, and other factors, not the gender.
YOur new bf sounds sensible, and you are responding to his request very sensibly, too

Reply to cybershrink

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