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Question
Posted by: Kari | 2008/10/02

Do i let go

My b-friend and i have been 2gether for 4 years. We are very happy now. He is a very sexy and attractive guy and totally the oposite, i' m cubby and not so pretty so u can imagine the things people are saying. But despite all of it we are still together and happier than ever. I love him a lot and he tells me everyday that he loves me and only me and he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. I use to be (maybe still are) very insecure about his love for me, but he has proved over and over that he loves me and wants to be with me. Sometimes he makes me feel used, but then i feel why would any guy stay with a girl for 4 years to just use her.

I' m scared that he might have cheated on me.So many things points out that he did. I confronted him so many times about it but he swears that he has been faithful 2 me frm day 1. He says i only see what i want to see. There are a few incidents that he cannot explain. But then if he did cheat then i should have heard something by now, cause we stay in a small community and everybody knows everybody' s business. But then again people are capable of keeping secrets.

Should i trust my instict or what. I don' t want2 live a lie. I' m scared that i might drive him away with my constant questions and paranoia. I don' t want to confront the girls cause i' m scared that i might hurt their feelings and1 one them were my friend.What should i do. Do you think i should just let this go or should i start digging? Please Help.

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Our expert says:
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Try relationship counselling together, to explore and try to settle these issues.

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Our users say:
Posted by: suede | 2008/10/02

You guys if a man does not cheat on you meaning he does not love you enough what do you want? enjoy the moment. when the time comes for him to cheat on you, you' ll cry and even try to kill yourself, to dig what is far from you is not good it will affect your health be happy with what you get.

Reply to suede
Posted by: Me too | 2008/10/02

I am also like that. It' s just so hard with all the cheating that is going on. People cheat so much, it is hard to believe when someone says he is not - and he is soooo good looking. I agree - it will drive them away eventually. But then again, like Kari is saying, there is this stuf that he can' t explain, like an open condom packet that was not mine....how do you know if you are imagining things or you should trust your instincts - coz one thing is for sure he will never admit it!!!!

Reply to Me too
Posted by: Me 2 Kari | 2008/10/02

I have also been with a guy for 4 years. He never cheated on his wife, he had never cheated on a girlfriend and he as never cheated on me.

YET i persist to check up on him. I drive to where he is suppose to be to check if he is. I look at his phone at night when he showers. I look through his wallet when he' s sleeping. I look in his car' s cubbyhole, in the door everywhere I can think even on his pc at home which is locked in his office whenever I can I check the history.

If I have not caught a single sms or a single thing why do I persist? Where is the problem? With him ? I think not. Girl we have to look within ourselves to find the problem. And yes I do think we will chase these guys away if we continue to behave like this.

Reply to Me 2 Kari

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