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Question
Posted by: Emily | 2010/02/03

Divorcing Sons and Brothers

Hi Cybershrink

Maybe not your line exactly, but I do not know who else to ask.
My brothers are two rotters who did my mother in financially and despite trying to go the legal route (pro-bono) they opposed paying her back the money that they owe her i.e. her pension, her house, her policies (both of them got themselves into serious trouble years ago and she helped them). The promises to pay her back never materialised. My mother is devastated and hurt. I am so worried because she is destitute and 100% dependant on me. All we have is my job and her state pension. Our family is not in a situation to help and even if they could I don' t think that they would - guess who the brothers take after, even look just like their dear uncles.

My mother who is 68 and does not need this now wants them out of her life totally. Imagine how much must have happened to get a mother to this point? I feel I have no future (44), I have my mom to support, I have about R300 000 debt I can never pay off, both of us are on anti-depressants and tranqs. Which man is ever going to want me with this kind of baggage and problem? Its a nightmare. And my mom is not 100% well either. Niether am I and trying to hold down a very hectic job.

Where does one go to heal - we really do not even have money to pay a minimum at a state psychologist.

I would like to know if it is possible for a mother to divorce her sons and for a daughter to divorce her siblings. For real. Don' t tell me to pray, we have done all the praying we are going to do for now.

Is there someone out there who knows if this is possible and the cheapest way to do it?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I did hear of an American case ( where else ) where a kid tried to divorce his parents, and he may even have succeeded.
In SA, where it is hard to even get murderers into court, let a,one convicted, I doubt that there's a chance of any such thing. I understand fully your sense of disgust at these people, but I'm not sure whether any form of legal "divorce" would be of use other than perhaps briefly emotionally satisfying. You can voluntarily exclude them from your affairs, anyway.
A legal opinion, eg from the free law clinic of your nearest law school, might be useful to review if anything can be done to recover the debts they owe to her. One would hope any sensible court would realize that not even a loving mother would choose to consign herself to penury in her old age to rescue two idiots from their own debts, and not at least expect to be repaid.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/02/03

I did hear of an American case ( where else ) where a kid tried to divorce his parents, and he may even have succeeded.
In SA, where it is hard to even get murderers into court, let a,one convicted, I doubt that there's a chance of any such thing. I understand fully your sense of disgust at these people, but I'm not sure whether any form of legal "divorce" would be of use other than perhaps briefly emotionally satisfying. You can voluntarily exclude them from your affairs, anyway.
A legal opinion, eg from the free law clinic of your nearest law school, might be useful to review if anything can be done to recover the debts they owe to her. One would hope any sensible court would realize that not even a loving mother would choose to consign herself to penury in her old age to rescue two idiots from their own debts, and not at least expect to be repaid.

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