Posted by: Cookie | 2010-01-12

Divorce settlement

My divorce was granted last year and I received the final divorce papers.The magistrate ordered my ex to pay maintenance,as he has not been paying maintenance for the past five years.We did have a divorce settlement in place(which he only signed because he did not have to support his child),stating that he has to pay her schoolfees.Now he is threatening me and telling me that he is going to lodge an application to set aside the divorce decree.Can he do that?He is making my life a living hell,telling me that he is going to get someone to cut my throat and that I will never be rid of him.Any advice will help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageDivorce support expert

Dear Cookie,

there are 2 aspects to be considered here.
One, the legal aspect where the law states that if someone must pay maintenance, so should they! Unfortunately many people are failed by the legal system. You can fight it but at a high cost, both financially and emotionally.
Number two is to draw an "emotional" line that you are moving on without any further claims and figure it out like many single parent do to be the sole provider for your child.
It is your choice, but fighting someone who has decided to not comply with the law is like being hostage to your own divorce.

As for the physical threats he has made, you can seek an interdict against him. These threats should never be taken lightly and it is your right to protect yourself and your child from any harm. I would urge you to go to the police with these threats.

You can contact me for a legal referral should you want to pursue the legal side.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: G-Dad | 2010-01-13

Nope he can not set the divorce decree aside, he had agreed to it and the courts made it an order, even though the divorce order do not cater for maintenance, you can still go to the maintenance court and get a maintenance order which will force him to pay maintenance,financial support from both biological parents is a right of every child and no divorce decree can stop that, I know of similar case where the biological mother had a legal agreement with the biological father that he only donate his sperm no sex, that she will never be able to claim maintenance and he has no rights to the child, well when her female lover left her, she had no alternative but to get maintenance to survive and took the father to maintenance court and he was forced to pay maintenance even with a legal binding contract.

The abuse should not be allowed, all threads should be taken seriously, I suggest that you go to the local court and get a protection order(DVI - domestic violence interdict) against him, he can then appose it, the courts will grant you such an order, the only problem is that he will deny everything and without proof the courts might not confirm that order when he appose it.
If someone heard him making such a thread then it will help.

Good luck.

Reply to G-Dad

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