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Question
Posted by: sally | 2010/11/17

Divorce

Good morning,I am not living together with my husband because he is beating me up and has babies with other women while he was married to me,Im fearing him yet he says he is not going to sign the papers if I divorce him.He says he rather go for counceling.I really need to start with the process.Will I need a lawyer in a case like this case? Will he be able to use councelling as a reason to get back together even if I dont love him,im afraid of him?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageFamily law expert

Your partner's conduct is certainly beyond the scope of a normal marriage relationship. A marriage relationship is based on mutual trust and respect and unfortunately it seems that the conduct of your spouse went completely beyond that scope. Adultery renders the continuation of the marriage relationship intolerable. I suggest that you consult an attorney as it seems that the chance to mend the relationship is obviously rather remote. In fact, you do not need your husband's signature in order to divorce him. If you issue summons the court will ultimately award a decree of divorce, the fact that he does not want to settle might delay the divorce, but ultimately the court will grant the order.

Bertus Preller
Family Law Attorney
Abrahams and Gross Attorneys
www.divorceattorney.co.za
bertus@divorceattorney.co.za

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Our users say:
Posted by: family law expert | 2010/11/20

Your partner's conduct is certainly beyond the scope of a normal marriage relationship. A marriage relationship is based on mutual trust and respect and unfortunately it seems that the conduct of your spouse went completely beyond that scope. Adultery renders the continuation of the marriage relationship intolerable. I suggest that you consult an attorney as it seems that the chance to mend the relationship is obviously rather remote. In fact, you do not need your husband's signature in order to divorce him. If you issue summons the court will ultimately award a decree of divorce, the fact that he does not want to settle might delay the divorce, but ultimately the court will grant the order.

Bertus Preller
Family Law Attorney
Abrahams and Gross Attorneys
www.divorceattorney.co.za
bertus@divorceattorney.co.za

Reply to family law expert
Posted by: sally | 2010/11/17

I would just like to thank the second reader''s option,the first reader please right in English I cannot understand the word you are saying.Im really interested in what you saying.

Reply to sally
Posted by: FIO | 2010/11/17

These days you can get a divorce for anything, all you have to do is state that there are irreconilable differences, or even that you no longer love the person thus staying married is no longer an option. Customary marriages are a different kettle of fish.

I would recommend going for counselling, just as a formality, as the courts can ask if you have tried to reconcile and tried counselling. BUt it is not a requirement.

He can refuse to sign the papers, but that does not mean the divorce can not be made valid through the courts.

You need to summons him with the papers and terms of divorce. He then defends it, which gives you a chance to defend his defence (in simple terms). Then you guys sit around a table to discuss hwo to proceed with the divorce. In this case you would need an attorney.

But if you try counselling, and from there you''ll probably be referred to mediation, the use of an attorney just becomes a formality to finalise the divorce and agreements.

Reply to FIO
Posted by: Mel | 2010/11/17

The hof sal egskeiding net op 3 gronde toestaan:
* Onherstelbare verbrokkeling van die huwelik
* As die ander gade onbewustelik is vir ''n lang termyn
* Of as die ander gade lang termyn tronk straf uit dien

Ek sien die fiesiese " abuse"  as gronde vir verbrokkeling van huwelik, want al wil hy counselling kry is dit nie die enigste rede nie hy het ook owerspel gepleeg.

Jy sal defnitief ''n prokereur nodig he :-)

Reply to Mel

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