Our expert says:
Its often a waste of energy to get too wound up about such a person. Sooner or later she is likely to reveal her true nature to others, even your fiancee. Getting too afitated about her, nasty though she is, wastes your energuy without havin g any real benefits.
STOP fearing that you may be judgemental --- when people do wrong and hurt others, they deserve to get judged negatively. It bothers me greatly that we seem to be constructing within SA society an equivalent to the pathologically incpmpetent policing and justice system --- one in which nobody, however evil or vicious towards others, must ever be judged or held accountable for their decisions and choices, or expected to face any consequences.
The distinction worth making is between intuition, in the sense of just having a FEELING that she may not be a pleasant person, and evidence-based opinion, having seen and heard her do unpleasant things.
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