Our expert says:
Its your house. Maybe just a calm but firm notification to your son and his wife, that while they are here, they must keep to YOUR house rules. Tellthem you're perfectly ready to do the same when you visit them, and will indeed practice leaving towels and clothes on the floor and scattered.
Throwing food on the floor is filthy behaviour, and makes one wonder what sort of upbringing your son is providing for his brood - you're not being over-fussy, he is being far too lackadaisical.
Make it clear they must share the household chores, especially cleaning up every bit of mess they create. If they find this unacceptable to their delicate tastes, they can always go back to their own grubby home
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