advertisement
Question
Posted by: mt | 2010/08/02

diplomacy

HELP I need to keep the peace..My son and fam have moved in for 2 weeks and my daughter in law has no idea of tidyness or cleanliness. Her children leave my house untidy and filthy eg. they bath and leave the bath water in the bath their face cloths on the floor the towels in every room and their clothes on the bath room floor. The children throw everything all over the place. It drives my husband mad as our children had to be clean and tidy and he can''t stand the filth. They eat and just throw their food on the floor and leave it for me to clean...I don''t want to upset anyone so how do I ask her to clean up after them.
Her mothers house is also filthy so without seeming unkind she knows no better. Even after supper everyone gets up and leaves me to clean. I didn''t the other night and they went to bed without so much as moving plates off the table!!!

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its your house. Maybe just a calm but firm notification to your son and his wife, that while they are here, they must keep to YOUR house rules. Tellthem you're perfectly ready to do the same when you visit them, and will indeed practice leaving towels and clothes on the floor and scattered.
Throwing food on the floor is filthy behaviour, and makes one wonder what sort of upbringing your son is providing for his brood - you're not being over-fussy, he is being far too lackadaisical.
Make it clear they must share the household chores, especially cleaning up every bit of mess they create. If they find this unacceptable to their delicate tastes, they can always go back to their own grubby home

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: John | 2010/08/03

i would make a sceptic joke about it, but still being firm when i say something like hey hey clean up that room of yours or pick-up the food and you are not pigs and then just tell them that thats the least they can do, you can still be honest i mean that is exactly why they keep doing it because no one is willing to act on this untidy living.

Good luck with the approach but rather be honest in a nice way than just keep quiet.

Reply to John
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/08/03

Its your house. Maybe just a calm but firm notification to your son and his wife, that while they are here, they must keep to YOUR house rules. Tellthem you're perfectly ready to do the same when you visit them, and will indeed practice leaving towels and clothes on the floor and scattered.
Throwing food on the floor is filthy behaviour, and makes one wonder what sort of upbringing your son is providing for his brood - you're not being over-fussy, he is being far too lackadaisical.
Make it clear they must share the household chores, especially cleaning up every bit of mess they create. If they find this unacceptable to their delicate tastes, they can always go back to their own grubby home

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Maria | 2010/08/02

2 weeks isn''t that long, can you grin and bear it? It does sound horrible. Is your daughter-in-law''s children also your son''s children? Surely he should know what you find acceptable and what not? Perhaps just ask him nicely to manage his family more in line with the way he was brought up, rather than blame it all on your daughter-in-law.

Reply to Maria

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement