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Question
Posted by: Psycho Cindy | 2010/09/29

Destructive behaviour

To start with I am a bipolar sufferer. I''m not using this as an excuse for my behaviour, but do think you should know in order for a good response.

I have been in a relationship for 3 years with a dear and loving man. He has however been extremely busy with work and I am someone who loves atttention. Everytime we have a fight, I push him to the limits where he tells me to stay out of his life.

I guess its not because he does it, but how he does it that drives me over the edge. That is still no excuse for my behaviour.

I go into a rage that borders to that of a demon. I do everything in my power to destroy him. Destroy his life and his work. Am I really this monster?

I have never been like this in all my life. And am not sure whether its the loss, the bipolar or just the mean side of me taking over... I have no control over my anger and rage and I don''t have any empathy for the people I hurt... until I go into a self pity stage after a week or more. Then I try to make peace and go into further rage when he wont listen.

Is there hope for me?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

There can be a significant difference between WANTING and loving attention, and actually NEEDING attention. And when one is too demanding and needy, this tends to drive away the very people whose attention you want.
Maybe you're no monster, but from your own description your behaviour at times may be monstrous. This all sounds MUCH more like aspects of personality disorder than Bipolar Disorder. It can be helped and changed by skilled psychotherapy, IF you agree that a change is needed and are prepared to work on it - and find a good local shrink to work with

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2010/09/29

Sounds like BPD to me.

Reply to anon
Posted by: justsaying | 2010/09/29

well you used the word " demon"  before there were pills and psychiatry long back into ancient times it was a known fact that demons are real and they can oppress people and change their behaviour, even full possession.

there is definitely hope, you need to understand love and its true power.

Reply to justsaying
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/29

There can be a significant difference between WANTING and loving attention, and actually NEEDING attention. And when one is too demanding and needy, this tends to drive away the very people whose attention you want.
Maybe you're no monster, but from your own description your behaviour at times may be monstrous. This all sounds MUCH more like aspects of personality disorder than Bipolar Disorder. It can be helped and changed by skilled psychotherapy, IF you agree that a change is needed and are prepared to work on it - and find a good local shrink to work with

Reply to cybershrink

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