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Question
Posted by: Tasha | 2012-08-22

Depression, low self esteem or what?

Have been dating my boyfriend for 9 months. On the 4th month of dating he told me while drunk that he is seeing still dating his son''s mother and has no intensions of leaving her. Stupid me, I stayed because I loved him. Now, the situation is getting the best of me. Tomorrow is his birthday, he just told me he wont be spending it with me.

I also recently went to see a clinical psychologist who confirmed to me that I have depression. Said based on my childhood, I have abandonment issues since after my parent''s divorce and my dad literally left us poor. She said I hold on to to toxic relationships which are emotionally damaging as a corrective emotional measure to make up for my past. This has led to me having low self esteem as I hang on to people who don''t deserve me and I feel like if I leave, no one will love me. (Guess kind of like how my dad left me and thought he did not love me).

What do you make of this? What should be my next step? Have not gone back to the clinical psychologist as this all too much for me. As I write this, tears are steaming down my face.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Thast must have been an unpleasant revelation from him, but you're surely better off knowing it than having him keep it secret for longer. If he is committed to someone else, you have lst nothing, only hopes for something more from someone who couldnt and wouldn't have given it to you
DO, please, go back to see the shrink you saw earlier, so long as she's not using only an old-fashioned analytical model for counselling, and uses more op to date methods. Also, consider seeing a psychiatrist or at least a good GP for assessment and to discuss adding a modern antidepressant to the mix.
From the sound of it, the shrink made a fairly shrewd assessment of the situation, but maybe gave you a bit too much information for a first session, and you'd probably have used it better if it has been spread out a little more, with morte opportunities for you to explore how to mcorrect these unpleasant and inaccurate assumptions you are basing your feelings upon.
Depression is a very unpleasant condition, but one which usully responds really well to competent treatment, and so you could be feeling a great deal better within weeks and months, if you commit yourself to working with a shrink to get this put right

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2012-08-22

Tasha, please go back to the psychologist. She can help you, and you need and deserved to be helped.

(((HUGS)))

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012-08-22

Thast must have been an unpleasant revelation from him, but you're surely better off knowing it than having him keep it secret for longer. If he is committed to someone else, you have lst nothing, only hopes for something more from someone who couldnt and wouldn't have given it to you
DO, please, go back to see the shrink you saw earlier, so long as she's not using only an old-fashioned analytical model for counselling, and uses more op to date methods. Also, consider seeing a psychiatrist or at least a good GP for assessment and to discuss adding a modern antidepressant to the mix.
From the sound of it, the shrink made a fairly shrewd assessment of the situation, but maybe gave you a bit too much information for a first session, and you'd probably have used it better if it has been spread out a little more, with morte opportunities for you to explore how to mcorrect these unpleasant and inaccurate assumptions you are basing your feelings upon.
Depression is a very unpleasant condition, but one which usully responds really well to competent treatment, and so you could be feeling a great deal better within weeks and months, if you commit yourself to working with a shrink to get this put right

Reply to cybershrink

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