advertisement
Question
Posted by: shirley - post 950 | 2011/02/24

depression

CS - Thank you for your advice, really appreciate it, I met him via the internet, weve exchanged photos, we had been talking over a year, via the phone (which cost us both a lot), email, sms, he lives overseas and we were to meet last year sometime but I cudnt make it due to my work situation, ive spoken to his mom so many times, so if it wasn’ t serious he wouldn’ t put me to speak to her so many times and kept telling me in front of him I should go over soon and that her son and I should soon get married, ive fallen in luv with him but like they say time heals all wounds… . I needed to also ask you w.r.t to my brother-in-law who has masturbated a couple of times in front of me when my sister wasn’ t around, she would be downstairs making breakfast and I would come out of my room and many times he would purposely put a mirror at an angle where I could see reflecting his bed masturbating and I wud pretend not to have seen anything…  I wud jus quickly go downstairs and help my sister, I needed to know, is this normal behavior, is he sick? Do I tell my sister, I don’ t wan hurt her?

Tanya –  thank u for yr concern, and I figured there was something wrong with his behavior from the beginning but he insisted we pursue the interaction as ive written to CS, and as much as im hurting I know I have to let go as ive fallen for him, hes a real Casanova too, but always undermining me as ive mentioned before and I guess that’ s his sort of transference of insecurities… . Thank you again… . & #61514 

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Allthese modern technologies make it much easier than before to make contact with people we have never actually met, and to feel as though we know them better than we actually do. Mothers can have various motivations, including sometimes a desire to see their son married. You may have a basis for thinking that you might like him in person, but only once you have met and spent considerable time together directly and in person, can you have a realistic idea of whether he's likeable, for you.
What you describe your brother-in-law doing isn't normal, and it isn't sick ( in the sense of being due to a sickness ), but it's a form of cheating on his wife and insulting towards you.
Who knows whether your sister knows about this sort of behaviour, which he may well have directed towards others before you. Only if you discuss it with her could you find out what she knows, wants to know, and how she feels about it. You could also deal with it directly to him, telling him you have no such interest in him, and that if he tries it again you will tell his wife.
And remember what it means for a guy to be "a real Casanova" - Casanova was loyal and faithful to no woman ; he liked to conquer them to make himself feel great

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/02/24

Allthese modern technologies make it much easier than before to make contact with people we have never actually met, and to feel as though we know them better than we actually do. Mothers can have various motivations, including sometimes a desire to see their son married. You may have a basis for thinking that you might like him in person, but only once you have met and spent considerable time together directly and in person, can you have a realistic idea of whether he's likeable, for you.
What you describe your brother-in-law doing isn't normal, and it isn't sick ( in the sense of being due to a sickness ), but it's a form of cheating on his wife and insulting towards you.
Who knows whether your sister knows about this sort of behaviour, which he may well have directed towards others before you. Only if you discuss it with her could you find out what she knows, wants to know, and how she feels about it. You could also deal with it directly to him, telling him you have no such interest in him, and that if he tries it again you will tell his wife.
And remember what it means for a guy to be "a real Casanova" - Casanova was loyal and faithful to no woman ; he liked to conquer them to make himself feel great

Reply to cybershrink

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement