Our expert says:
Its clear that your mother very much dislikes your wife - has she given any indication of WHY she hates her so much ? I understand that it must feel very bad for you that she blames you for this, but it IS your mother, and maybe she feels you could do more to protect her from the malevolent and unpleasant old woman ?
Presumably, if you are a really traditional Zulu family, she would have interfered strongly to prevent you marrying this woman - does this suggest that she felt OK about your wife at that time, and something changed since then ? Can you think of anything that happened to mother or in the family, around the time she changed her mind about your wife ? Your mother must surely realize that her malicious gossip about your wife must hurt you and make your life more unpleasant - why would she insist on doing that ?
I hope your wife is studying nursing at a proper institution so her qualifications will be widely recognized so she can get a job - how much longer will her training last ?
And you're right, it is very important, whatever else is happening, to set aside some time, even a little, purely for the pair opf you to spend some quiet time together as a couple.
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