Posted by: anonymous | 2009-07-22

daughter in law

My daughter in law ie sons girlfriend is treating him so badly at present, just showing hostility to him all the time and messing him around as much as she can without being unfaithful (I think!). They live together- have for years and have a darling 2 year old. We help them financially a great deal and give them generous financial gifts. I suspect this girlfriend is using the situation for her own financial gain - the house is my son' s-but I think the strain in the home is bad for the little one. How does one handle this woman? My son tries at all times to be reasonable and kind. Right now he would love to kick her out but doesn' t want to lose his child.

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Our expert says:
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Try to encourage them into marriage / relationship counselling. And maybe it'd be wise to get a legal opinion --- if she becomes actively nasty, it isn'ta foregone conclusion that she would be able to take the child away from him

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Our users say:
Posted by: Another daughter in law | 2009-07-22

You should actually be trying to be supportive. There are always two sides to a story. You seem to paint such an innocent picture of your son and make your daughter in law out to be a golddigger and even insinuate that she isn' t faithful. You should be neutral and help find a solution to their problem not add to it. My mom in law loves spending money on her children and buying them expense things I think she just uses that as a hold on them - seems to be working because they cant seem to do without her aid. Very manipulative dont you think. Your child is an adult who has his own child he should be standing on his own two feet anyway. As Inge politely put it be caring not meddling I think its a little too late for that.

Reply to Another daughter in law
Posted by: Inga | 2009-07-22

Whateva you do please remember he is an ADULT and if he' s old enough to have a baby then he' s old enough to sort out his own affairs. Stop giving them money. If they desperately need the money for food or whatever the rather buy them the food. You can be a caring parent but please don' t be a meddling parent.

Reply to Inga

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