Our expert says:
Anxiety and depresion often urn up together. And this situation seems to reflect exactly why I rarely consider it adequate to treat Depression solely with drugs and neglecting psychotherapy to deal with the negative habits of thought that are usually a part of the problem.
If he is not sleeping properly, and remains highly irritable, it does not sound as though the treatment is being optimally successful, and I hope his treating psychiatrist is aware of this. And I hope he is being treated, as should EVERY complex case of depression, but a proper specialist psychiatrist rather than by a GP.
You are not being disloyal in your concerns - it is not a requirement of loyalty that you put up with rude and inconsiderate treatment, nor that you should fail to worry about an inadequately or unsuccessfully successful spouse.
In sickness and health means one should not rejec a spouse simply because they have an illnes - not that one should support them if they insist on having that illness untreated or inadequately treated
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