advertisement
Question
Posted by: Devastated | 2011/01/08

Contribution

I am devastated, I cannot believe or think straight. My ex daughter in-law has been nagging my son since the time they got divorced 8 years ago, she wants to change their 3 children age 16, 14, and 12''s surname to her new married surname, I fought with my son not to give consent but she kept on and on that eventually he had a meeting with his kids and of course they were brainwashed they told him they want to go under their step dad''s surname this happened last year.........I haven''t seen these kids since last year every time I phoned them they never answered. This morning I received a phone call from the ex daughter in-law asking me if I could contribute towards the 3 kids school uniform and stationery?? Excuse me I have been denied these kids they are now on the step dad''s surname my question is why should I contribute when I haven''t been recognized and have also been denied contact ?.......I feel like a used rag please advise me I love these kids I blame their parents I would willingly help them but on the other hand I''m a pensioner.....I need some input please !

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageFamily law expert

Unless your son consent to the surname change, the ex won't be able to change it, however, unfortunately, the children's views need to be taken into consideration as well. You are not obliged to contribute to the maintenance of your grand children, unless the parents aren't able to maintain them, unless of course if a court order specifies otherwise.

Bertus Preller
B.Proc; AD Dip L Law
Divorce and Family Law Attorney
Abrahams and Gross Inc.
E: bertus@divorceattorney.co.za
W: http://www.divorceattorney.co.za
Twitter: www.twitter/edivorce
Facebook: www.facebook.com/divorceattorneys
Skype: divorceattorney

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

9
Our users say:
Posted by: family law expert | 2011/01/16

Unless your son consent to the surname change, the ex won't be able to change it, however, unfortunately, the children's views need to be taken into consideration as well. You are not obliged to contribute to the maintenance of your grand children, unless the parents aren't able to maintain them, unless of course if a court order specifies otherwise.

Bertus Preller
B.Proc; AD Dip L Law
Divorce and Family Law Attorney
Abrahams and Gross Inc.
E: bertus@divorceattorney.co.za
W: http://www.divorceattorney.co.za
Twitter: www.twitter/edivorce
Facebook: www.facebook.com/divorceattorneys
Skype: divorceattorney

Reply to family law expert
Posted by: Devastated | 2011/01/10

To Sick and Tired.............Thanks for your concern, I have made up my mind after a year not hearing from my grand kids or her why should I be taken for a sucker ? When I tried to contact my grand kids last year that their biological grand dad had passed away I couldn''t get hold of anyone.........I have since moved on with open wounds who have almost healed and now I receive a phone call asking for contributions, I haven''t even got her phone number she will most probably contact me tomorrow a day before school reopens. I will have my ammunition out to let her know I''m no longer available......Thank you Sick and Tired and God Bless you !

Reply to Devastated
Posted by: Sick and Tired | 2011/01/10

Lmao I just think all ex family in law are a bunch of pain in the bums, Do not give her any money let her fend for herself and the children, that is what she wanted in the first place and now that the wench sees it is not so cheap she wants to suck money out of an innocent pensioner. . .

Reply to Sick and Tired
Posted by: Devastated | 2011/01/10

To Celeste........thanks for putting the record straight !

Reply to Devastated
Posted by: Celeste [To Annon] | 2011/01/10

To Annon......Did you read Devastated post correctly? No I don''t think so, didn''t you read this Ex DIL alienated the children from her and their father? Didn''t you read when she tried to contact these kids they did not respond? Before you ask stupid questions like "  Does your son pay Maintenance ?"  Why the hell must he pay maintenance when the kids are not on his Surname? Learn to read the post properly before you comment !

Reply to Celeste [To Annon]
Posted by: Devastated [post 106] | 2011/01/10

To Annon, Thanks for your input.........Yes my son paid the maintenance until his Ex brainwashed the kids and all hell broke loose and the name change happened......For your information I never dwelled in their affairs ever......I was used and abused by the Ex DIL and now she has surfaced again because obviously Mr. New Husband cant cope looking after the step children ! So who else will she target now? She told my son she wants him out of the children''s lives and I have witness to that, my grand kids approached me.........I told them there is nothing I can do they must decide what they want to do.........So yes their decisions were not very sensible because EX DIL brainwashed them !

Reply to Devastated [post 106]
Posted by: annon | 2011/01/10

HI
i think you dwell too much into your children''s affair. this is between your son and your ex-daughter in law. if your son agrees to the surname change, then i dont see any point for you to be concerned.
by the way does your son contributes to this children''s maintenance?

Reply to annon
Posted by: Devastated [post 106] | 2011/01/09

Hi Celeste, thanks for your concern.........God Bless !

Reply to Devastated [post 106]
Posted by: Celeste | 2011/01/08

Devastated.........Wow that is what I call a low blow, I think your ex DIL has a cheek to contact you after she has put your son and you through all this pain, I''''m sorry I can''''t really advise you but if it was me I would tell her to take a running jump to hell. I hope someone can give you some advice !

Reply to Celeste

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement