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Question
Posted by: Linki | 2012/07/05

Confused and Stressed

I don''t think I still love my husband, this hurts me and stresses me out. We''ve been married for more than 9 yrs now and it hurts me to see us in this situation. My husband did many things to me that caused me to recent him. He used to constantly tell me he wants to divorce me and that made me feel so rejected to a point where I started hating him. The last time he did that I thought he was gonna go through with it but he didn''t. He had an affair also so many things happened between us good and bad. 4 years ago I met a guy who stole my heart when I didn''t expect it. I''m married to my husband but my heart is with another guy. My husband is really trying to be a good husband and a good father and it pains me that i feel the way i do. i wish I can love him again the way I used to, I find that so impossible to do. I''m constantly thinking about the other guy, when i go to bed, when i wake up all day everyday:(. This saddens me. And I don''t know what to do.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its obviously understandable if you stopped feeling affection for someone who kept threatening divorce and showed no affection to you. If your husband is currently trying to be good, why not suggest to him that the pair of you get into marriage counselling, and see what can be sorted out ? We can't force ourselves to love someone else, just as you can;'t force yourself to laugh when there's nothing funny.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Mr. Divider (Specialist in divorce cases) | 2012/07/06

Here is solution:

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Reply to Mr. Divider (Specialist in divorce cases)
Posted by: Gracie | 2012/07/06

I am in the same situation as you - married to someone who has over a period of 14 years destroyed all my feelings for him. Nothing anyone says or does will make you love your husband again. I know how you feel!

Reply to Gracie
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/07/05

Its obviously understandable if you stopped feeling affection for someone who kept threatening divorce and showed no affection to you. If your husband is currently trying to be good, why not suggest to him that the pair of you get into marriage counselling, and see what can be sorted out ? We can't force ourselves to love someone else, just as you can;'t force yourself to laugh when there's nothing funny.

Reply to cybershrink

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