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Question
Posted by: pixie | 2010/08/30

confused

Hey, i hope all is well with you ? we all just blab our probs out but never really ask how you are … 
Well, it’ s the Pixie from before, you know, the suicidal one… 
I am so very insecure, and when I tell people that they say things I want to hear, but not really what I need to hear. I’ m really scared of failing, in life, in everything. I am scared of being left alone. Once I allow someone to be nice to me and love me I actually start suffocating them, because im scared they might be gone tomorrow. And in this process im alienating people!
I also lie a lot, not bad lies, just tell things that aren’ t so, like that its going perfectly well with me, and inside I’ m crumbling apart. I do things for attention  sometimes even negative attention is good enough. Like when people get so upset with me that they yell and swear, even though their words hurt, at least I got them to speak to me…  people always wants me to leave them alone, and when I do, they ask me why am I keeping distance?
Sometimes its so bad that I wish I had a mental illness and will be locked inside a psych ward..
The worst of all this, I am studying applied psych, im supposed to know black from white, I don’ t.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hi Pixie, I'm getting by -thanks for asking !
Its fair that you don't want to fail in life ( people who DO want to fail in life are a different problem !) But there's the risk that if one concentrates too exclusively on the possibilities of failure, one can get too scared to actually TRY anything, and then of course one forces oneself to fail. Failure, at times, may be disappointing but useful, so long as we learn from our errors and failures, and function better the next time round.
Sounds like you are pre-occupied with trying to make other people feel good and to make them like you, when they'd probably like you mopre if you didn't try so hard, and if you had the confidence to just be your perfectly pleasant self.
If you're studying, surely there should be a proper student counselling service, which would be a good place for you to explore these issues, and sort it all out

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/08/31

Hi Pixie, I'm getting by -thanks for asking !
Its fair that you don't want to fail in life ( people who DO want to fail in life are a different problem !) But there's the risk that if one concentrates too exclusively on the possibilities of failure, one can get too scared to actually TRY anything, and then of course one forces oneself to fail. Failure, at times, may be disappointing but useful, so long as we learn from our errors and failures, and function better the next time round.
Sounds like you are pre-occupied with trying to make other people feel good and to make them like you, when they'd probably like you mopre if you didn't try so hard, and if you had the confidence to just be your perfectly pleasant self.
If you're studying, surely there should be a proper student counselling service, which would be a good place for you to explore these issues, and sort it all out

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