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Question
Posted by: Girl | 2009/10/22

clit, orgasm and more...

Hi doc, i have a problem and really want help. Im 19 and have been sleeping with my BF for 8 months now, we have sex about everyday except on saturday and sunday, and iv never reached orgasm, i dont know why, everyone says i should try stimulate myself but im scared i hurt myself ect. is this normal? he does go down on me and uses his hands all the time but nothing, my clit is VERY sensitive i cant keep still when he has contact with it its almost TOO sensitive, and my clit often gets swollen and irritated. why is this happening????

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Dear Girl,

I firstly need to agree with those who are recommending that you first learn to stimulate yourself to orgasm. You will not hurt yourself. If anything you are in a better position whilst stimulating yourself to regulate the intensity, location and focus of stimulation in response to the signals your own body is giving you.

Each women is different and find that different intensities, localities on and around the clitoris and focus of stimulation is more or less stimulating and what type intensifies senation to orgasm.

Onse you have mastered self stimulation, you are in a much better position to guide and direct your bf to stimulate you in the way that works best for you.

The reason your clit may be getting swollen and stimulated is the extended and possibly anxious stimulation on the part of your boyfriend and your own loss of lubrication as you become tense and anxious about trying to orgasm.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: supah | 2009/11/14

Well, have you come right with your problem? I hope you have told him? if so are things better? and do you believe his penis size or something has anything to do with it? was a previous lover bigger or better?

Reply to supah
Posted by: julie | 2009/11/05

i have had a two of boyfriends and it seems like every sexual encounter has just never resulted in an orgasm . i used to orgasm by masturbation alone but now i cant even masturbat i dont feel right and when we get to the penetrative part i switch off completely and the sound of too much liquid in my vagina just puts me off as well. need help

Reply to julie
Posted by: Uncomfy | 2009/10/23

Hi Girl, Iam 17 .I have not started penetrative sex yet..but have a similar issue...read post 3508. However do you masturbate on your own and have orgams? easily?

Reply to Uncomfy
Posted by: Sexologist | 2009/10/22

Dear Girl,

I firstly need to agree with those who are recommending that you first learn to stimulate yourself to orgasm. You will not hurt yourself. If anything you are in a better position whilst stimulating yourself to regulate the intensity, location and focus of stimulation in response to the signals your own body is giving you.

Each women is different and find that different intensities, localities on and around the clitoris and focus of stimulation is more or less stimulating and what type intensifies senation to orgasm.

Onse you have mastered self stimulation, you are in a much better position to guide and direct your bf to stimulate you in the way that works best for you.

The reason your clit may be getting swollen and stimulated is the extended and possibly anxious stimulation on the part of your boyfriend and your own loss of lubrication as you become tense and anxious about trying to orgasm.

Reply to Sexologist

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