Posted by: lady nina | 2009-04-30


hi cs

hope you are well??

i' ve had a tough month this time round, was my 40th birthday and we planned a family camp, one cousin ( first time she came as part of the family) got drunk and started to swear her kids in front of everyone, eventually got so bad i told her to remove herself from the party, her mother ( my aunt) and the kids had a terrible embarressing time, during the evening the aunt kept saying sorry for her child behaviour, she sat outside the venue with all her tantrums, the next morning the my aunt comes to me and told me i hurt her child so much when i told her to leave the party and i should appolizie to my cousin... i refused and reminded them that they paid nothing for the weekend, everything was for free since i paid for their accomodation. they left without things being sorted

we got home and our home in a security complex was burgulared by students that stays in the complex , they took all the electrionic stuff and most of b personal girli stuff

we knew the police would not do anyhting so we locked up and went on holiday for 4 days , picking up his eldest daughter and her bf , first night they got drunk and picked a fight - dad told them to leave he took my side and granpa drove 150 km on the sunday night to collect her and bf??? the rest of the holiday was wonderful

next dad trf monthly maintenance from dubai - i collect the cash from Bidvest - more that r2000.00 gets stolen by his son out of my home - when we confront him he denies everything

next i dog jumps infront my car and R19000.00 damages - problems with insurance company

next i get told my rent gets increased with R1000.00

I' m punch drunk at the moment - just want to stay in bed, i ' ve tried to deal with every crisis as best i could and i think in a dignified manner - but i' m scared.

first the problem with the cousin - the way my aunt covers for her and justifies her rotten behavior
then granpa who drives so far to collect a the girl
surely the way we raise our kids are wrong ...

sorry to dump everyhting on you but i thought others might be greatfull fro their lives after reading my hectic month

take care nina

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Our expert says:
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Hi lady nina --- good to hear from you again, after far too long.
Yes, some months are so bad it makes even some other dreadful months seem better, by comparison.
Of course you acted correctly, in applying some discipline to the silly drunk, and in refusing to apologise for her bad behaviour. People like that need to realize that they are responsible for their behaviour ( eg drinking too much ) and for the consequences of behaving like that.
Commiserations on the burglary. Interestiong, if girly stuff was stolen, that sounds like girli burglars ? A gay colleague when I worked in the States used to say you could always tell when you had had gay burglars --- when you came home,the furniture would be re-arranged, and the place would look MUCH better.
Why do people who intend to get drunk an ugly, insist on doing so when other people are around ?
I'm guessing those expensive damages were to the car --- was the suicidal dog undamaged ?
I'm sure you're right that too many people are raising kids to assume that they are always blameless, and can behave any way they please.
But DON'T get punch drunk --- you've had too many drunks in your life this month already

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