Posted by: minki | 2013-02-21


Hi doc pls help my 9 yr old started at a new lovely schl this yr Gr 4 there appears to be one kid in particular that has decided she wont like her...passing comments on the first day that she refuses to play with her because her hair is gold in color!!! then weeks later actually asking my daughter if the others told her she said this ..i think she noticed my daughter pulling away and ignoring her. My daugther tells me such stories almost weekly. To help her settle in for the first few weeks i walked my daughter right up to her classroom also just to help with the heavy bags which she is not used to carrying and now has a locker to help that problem.., Point is im not the only parent who sometimes walks up to the class, even kids whove been at the school longer. I notice this girl looking at me when i do this...i almost predicted in my mind, she noticed now that ive stopped walking my daughter and promptly asks her :" So where is your mother"  my daughter says she just mumbled to her why do you want to know..."  My question is i feel this kids is going to become a full on bully towards my daughter who happens to be quite assertive mind do i empower her right now to either stop this in its tracks or to rise above her in future should more comments come out. She also tramped on my daughters hand as she picked up something and while she said sorry she grinned, my daughter perceived it to be done on purpose. My daughter was popular at her old school and i can already see the same is happening here i.e. much loved by almost all teachers and kids, has lots of friends and is described as kind and extremely well mannered one teacher said to me my daughter has old fashioned well manners that you hardly see in a kid these days, she is not an extrovert but can stand her ground. I always get compliments how loving and respectful she is and what a special child she is....she loves all but i dont like how i see this ONE child is unsettling her...pls help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Son't over-react. This sounds like a nasty and snotty little girl, but there's usually at least one in a class. And maybe her own hair looks mousy and her own mom wouldn't come near the school to support her and she feels jealous.
Rather than overdo the "empower" thing, teach her to ignore the sad little twerp. Paying attention to her only encourages her.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lol | 2013-02-21

I say, as the parent go up to the kid and tell the kid, to refrain from talking or coming near your daughter. And scare her off by saying that you will take her parents to court should her behaviour continue. Well I was bullied at school. And I wished someone scared my bullies of like that. This bully, wants your daughter to suck up to her. And she''s feeling irritated, cause she can se that your daughter is ignoring her. Which is a good thing. The best is to teach her bully tactics, and how she respond to those bully tactics. Also teach your daughter, to be loud and confident. I was just like your daughter. Very quiet, decent.and respectable. But now you need to let her still be that angel. But an assertive and confident angel.


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