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Question
Posted by: Anon | 2012/03/13

Body hair

I am 21 male and shy or scared to show my armpit hair. The same goes for pubic and leg hair.

I am not sure why, as all men have hair, but I feel stressed when it comes to other people seeing the part of my body very few people see.

I did not have any friend (male) for a while as my school work and then later job was very important to me.

Now I find it hard to approach other men for friendship and the exposing body thing also stresses me.

I am not the normal man in terms of the norm. I get over sensitive and get very emotional about people.

when i get a friend, I get obsesses. Maybe not a good thing.

I do not lead a gay life style and have never even spoken to a gay man. I am attracted to men , but chose to not be gay. No one even knows i am gay.

I want a male friend, not boy friend that I can be myself with, that I can be comfortable infront of and who can handle my nature(sensitive and introvert)

I find most men to be self obsesses and part animals who only lust after woman.

Maybe is father issues or lack of a father?

What do I do?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

SOme people are naturally shy, some even to the more serious and incapacitating degree of a social anxiety disorder ( and both respond well to treatment ).
From what you say, it sems for some reason you focus your embarrassment mainly on the issue of hair rather than just the unaccustomed exposure of parts of the body not usually displayed.
The "norm" is far, far, wider than you imagine.
Being gay is not something one chooses, merely a way of being ; and it doesn't sound sure whether or not you are. Sounds like your primary problem is shyness and self-consciousness in relating to other humans of any gender. Maybe men seem a bit more appealing just because, being male yourself, they're a bit more familiar ?
It makes sense that you really want a friend or friends with whom you can feel more confident and comfortable, and maybe to gradually expand your social contacts and friendships.
Seeing a psychologist could help, both to clarify the nature of your concerns, and to learn more self-esteem, less self-consciousness and embarrassment, and more confidence in building social relationships with all sorts of other people

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Obvious | 2012/03/13

You cannot choose not to be gay if thats what you are. Anymore than you can choose not to be black or white, short or tall.

Would suggest therapy

Reply to Obvious
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/03/13

SOme people are naturally shy, some even to the more serious and incapacitating degree of a social anxiety disorder ( and both respond well to treatment ).
From what you say, it sems for some reason you focus your embarrassment mainly on the issue of hair rather than just the unaccustomed exposure of parts of the body not usually displayed.
The "norm" is far, far, wider than you imagine.
Being gay is not something one chooses, merely a way of being ; and it doesn't sound sure whether or not you are. Sounds like your primary problem is shyness and self-consciousness in relating to other humans of any gender. Maybe men seem a bit more appealing just because, being male yourself, they're a bit more familiar ?
It makes sense that you really want a friend or friends with whom you can feel more confident and comfortable, and maybe to gradually expand your social contacts and friendships.
Seeing a psychologist could help, both to clarify the nature of your concerns, and to learn more self-esteem, less self-consciousness and embarrassment, and more confidence in building social relationships with all sorts of other people

Reply to cybershrink

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