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Posted by: Abigail | 2011-04-10

Bitchy sister-in-law & mdash - arrggghhhhhh!!!

My sister in law is a really bitchy woman and I just cannot handle her anymore ... she is always making snide remarks about everything and always has a sarcastic answer to everything! She is seriously starting to annoy me! She is a housewife by choice. She complains about the fact that there is very little money to go around, yet does not bother looking for work. She was a branch manager at one of the banks and resigned when she had her baby. She made the decision to rather resign than go on maternity leave. Her husband works very hard to support his family, but all she does is find fault with the money he brings in!! It has reached the stage where he leaves home at 5 a.m. to go to gym and from there he goes to work and often returns home late at night, which she also moans about!! She told me that she goes thru her husband''s personal emails as well as his cellphone to check his messages and call log ... I sometimes think that she is bored with the life she has or is very insecure since she stopped working. She is also extremely jealous and watches his every move when they visit us. He is not even allowed to kiss or hug me when he greets me or any other female relatives. He was a very charming and friendly man at one stage, but has now become very withdrawn and moody! I feel so sorry for him as he tries so hard, but nothing is good enough for this lazy biatch he is married to! She even sends her 14 yr old daughter with him to gym in the morning ... why we have yet to find out!!!! She writes letters to him whilst he is at work accusing him of having affairs and flirting with other women (including me), but she is too much of a coward to confront me about it! Her husband has told my husband that he is so tired of the life he has, but has to stay for the sake of his two children! I used to feel sorry for her as I always only heard her version of events, but now that he has told his side too, I realise that she is the cause of her unhappiness and misery .. not him, nor me or anybody else for that matter. He invited us to lunch one Sunday and when we arrived, I overheard her telling my niece (her daughter) that I am one of the women whose eyes she would love to scratch out! I am innocent, have not done anything to deserve this kind of treatment from this woman ... she makes me sick!! Her insane jealousy is turning her into an ugly person who we would rather not be around ... what do I do? Just ignore her and treat her with the contempt she deserves? Her husband is a very attractive and sexy man and also a very hard worker. She is lucky to have someone who works so hard to give her everything she wants ... she might just wake up one day and he will no longer be there ...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

How essential is it to "handle her " TO what extent is she avoidable ? People who make bad ( from heir point of view ) choices in their lives, can be very inclined to blame others, or to find fault with others ( to help them feel that others are even worse off than them ).
From the sound of it she may well, indeed, feel insecure and bored.
But this also sounds like Pathological Jealousy, as its usually absurd to suspect her husband of an affair with his sister, or at the gym at 6 am. Its not necessaily to the benefit of the children to stay around too unhappy a marriage, rather than with at leas a contented and less hard-working father. She could go back to work. Any maintenance court would have to look at how much she DID earn, and could still earn, and would not want to support her in bitter idleness.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Truth | 2011-04-10

To describe your sister in laws husband as a sexy and attractive man is suspect? You are overly invested here- l think this is not the whole story................

Reply to Truth
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-04-10

How essential is it to "handle her " TO what extent is she avoidable ? People who make bad ( from heir point of view ) choices in their lives, can be very inclined to blame others, or to find fault with others ( to help them feel that others are even worse off than them ).
From the sound of it she may well, indeed, feel insecure and bored.
But this also sounds like Pathological Jealousy, as its usually absurd to suspect her husband of an affair with his sister, or at the gym at 6 am. Its not necessaily to the benefit of the children to stay around too unhappy a marriage, rather than with at leas a contented and less hard-working father. She could go back to work. Any maintenance court would have to look at how much she DID earn, and could still earn, and would not want to support her in bitter idleness.

Reply to cybershrink

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