Posted by: Phoebe | 2010-05-11

Bipolar Toddler??

Hi Doc,
My Toddler is now 3 years. We adopted him and got him when he was 6 weeks old. he was very very tiny, his bio-mom binded her tummy to prevent showing. from an early age I saw L was a very sensitive and emotional child. he smiled and cried within seconds from each other. He’ s now happy and just suddenly would burst out crying and the tears could flood a river!

he is very possessive about me and is constantly telling everyone my mommy. even our older son now 4 aren’ t allowed near me when L is on my lap. he also constantly gathers his toys and want to build a house with cushions and blankets and no one except me is allowed to touch that ''house'' when his brother tries to touch it (usually spitefully) L will bust out in extreme anger, verbally attacking J or will burst out in a tantrum. he will also bite, kick yells etc. he will scream profanities to J, will also say stuff like, I’ m going to chop of your head, or you must drown in the toilet, he will also if he is in one of his moods constant say words like breast or penis (but more crudely). He will also say stuff like, he is a girl and must put on a dress. If I say to him to stop it he will continues with this. but if I ignore this it will stop in about 3 to 5 minutes.

When he want my attention he will repeat mamma, mamma, mamma over and over and over till I turn around look at him and asks what it is, he will not stop until till I look at him.

When he is in an upset mood, and I give him a bit of water he will throw the water or he will push the plate of food away with such force it usually ends up on the ground.

he is great at pre-school, no issues there. The day care girl says he is not putting one foot wrong… ? he has friend and dont cry when we drop him off..

His temper tantrums are not like most toddlers. They are much longer and it is almost impossible to calm him down without giving in –  he will NOT give in. when I said to him no don’ t pull on the table cloth he will run screaming to his room and bangs the door shut. He will then sit in the room or throw things around whatever he can get his hands on but he will not stop or get out of the room only when I go in and pick him up. Then he will allow me to wipe his face and blew his nose. (usually I need to put a dry shirt on, wet with tears) he can then smile and laugh within minutes. But don’ t say to him stop it and come get out of your room. He will not budge. I left him once and after 2 hours I couldn’ t take it anymore and went to get him.

He does not sleep thru, every night at 9.30 / 9.45 he will wake up crying then he wants me, he only settles in when he is lying with us in bed. Then only will he sleep thru, when I go to fetch him, he will be sitting upright but is still asleep. He will then scratch himself (still asleep) usually at the back of his neck or at his lower back. He will be crying and calling me. (still fast asleep)

He is also biting his nails, if I tell/ask him something and he don’ t want to do it he will stand shock still and start biting his nails when I tell him to stop it, he will run to the room. And the vicious cycle starts again. he is very manipulative I think.

My oldest are suffering of this. He is drawing negative attention from me by pushing L or taking things from him. Then I will scold him because L is now crying. L wants me to himself. Both children are adopted. J will sometimes said to me he don’ t like his brother.

L only wants my husband to take him to the toilet no one else are allowed. He also demands that my husband carries him everywhere. Suddenly he can’ t walk when my husband is near :-)

He is actually very cute and everyone that sees him says he is cute, he loves to cuddle and kiss, he is short and got a high pitch voice. He is the shortest in his class. He also couldn’ t hear because of ear infection that we was not aware off, after he got grommits (1 year) he started talking but even today I need to listen closely to hear what he is saying.

I think also because of his size he must fight harder to be accepted. Because he and his brother are in the same day care he plays with this brother, that is the older boys.

he also develop croup and we are seeing a dr about his growth.

I’ m tired, don’ t know how to handle him what am I to do next I dont know if i''m looking at a bipolar toddler or what?

tx - any advise would be welcome.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Answered the last time you posted this question

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Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-05-11

Answered the last time you posted this question

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