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Question
Posted by: anon | 2008/05/28

bf want sex sex sex

guys, i get so depresed cause my boyfriend, who has a much higher sex drive than myself, always wants to make love. I am never in the mood. i cant even kiss him without him wanting sex. he never forces himself on me, but i feel so guilty. I believe my main problem is my depression. And when we do have sex, even if i was in the mood, i get extremely depressed. I hit like a all time low. i feel like i rather die than feel this way. then when i dont want to have sex he looks so upset and dissapointed.He saz he isnt upset and holds me, but i can see the change in his face. i feel crap.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If he doesn't care that you're not in the mood, he's having sex, not making love. However, when you describe feeling very depressed, even when you are in the mod, when you have sex, this strongly suggests that there are deeper issues in play here, and that you might well benefit from seeing a shrink for a careful assessment and advice. Depression can have a major impact on libido, for instance.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: E.S. | 2008/05/28

I understand the depressing feeling after sex. I used to feel the same way in a previous relationship. And I was depressed at the time.
Now I'm with a man that treats me much better. At least he tries to understand. I still feel realy scared that he might leave me after we made love. Especially if it is in the morning. I need him to hold me for a long time, and tell me that he loves me, AFTER we made love.
Try asking your boyfriend to try and be loving towards you throughout the day. Just kissing and touching, without getting excited. It also helps a lot if there are no unresolved issues between the two of you. And I can confess that it makes a big difference for girls like us, if it is a guy that realy cares about you, and you care about.
It also helps to relieve him sometimes without him having to ask. I hated it at first, because I still don't understand why they just can't stuff their lust into their pockets. But it takes a lot of pressure off you.
I feel more relaxed and willing when I know that my bf is not horny as hell, and I can get in the mood on my own time. WIth lots of attention from him.
Good luck!

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