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Question
Posted by: Jills | 2010/05/07

Bad mom

I really feel like a terrible mom and I am busy failing my children.

I have no support at all coming in and I look after 3 children aged from 6-13 years. The children did not go to school 2 days this week as it was just to far for them to walk and I had no petrol money.

It is weekend and I know I will not be able to provide the way I should for them. I have absolutely no food at home and we have also been without electricity for almost a week now.

It is very hard on the children, I have been to the electricity department and they have agreed to connect my electricity today as I was able to make a payment arrangement.

The older one understands and she is very strong. I do not want to involve the dad as I have been in a very abusive relationship, although he might be able to help.

Please pray for my family for some sort of relief. The kids desperately need winter clothes and my wish is just a decent meal for them tonight.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I'm sory to hear of your awful current situation. You're no a bad mom, and you're trying your best - we all at times face situations in which our best just doesn't quite seem the best. But we work out a way eventually.
YOu don't have to rely on charity from the children's dad - he is obliged by law to provide for the costs of caring for his kids, and if you will approach the Maintenance Court, the court will look into your respective situations and will require him to contribute towards the expenses of the children.
Meanwhile, check out the churches and NGO's in your area who may be able to help in the meantime, and could offer some counselling to explore how you have got into such a financial bind, and how to work your way out of it.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: sam | 2010/05/07

You have to go to a church or to the welfare. Even if you go to a different church where no one knows you, it''s not for you, it''s for your children. Also do yourself a favour and talk to the school. Most schools are willing to help, by allowing the family to stay anon, and then they ask all the kids to bring canned food, or pastas or something warm to wear, and then they do the hand over, and no one ever knows for who it was.

Reply to sam
Posted by: Jills | 2010/05/07

Hi thanks for the advise no I haven''t as I am trying to keep a low profile as he will do anything to get back at me or get the kids.

I am on my own with this.

Reply to Jills
Posted by: Purple | 2010/05/07

Have you approached your church or an NGO in your area who might be able to help you?

Reply to Purple
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/05/07

I'm sory to hear of your awful current situation. You're no a bad mom, and you're trying your best - we all at times face situations in which our best just doesn't quite seem the best. But we work out a way eventually.
YOu don't have to rely on charity from the children's dad - he is obliged by law to provide for the costs of caring for his kids, and if you will approach the Maintenance Court, the court will look into your respective situations and will require him to contribute towards the expenses of the children.
Meanwhile, check out the churches and NGO's in your area who may be able to help in the meantime, and could offer some counselling to explore how you have got into such a financial bind, and how to work your way out of it.

Reply to cybershrink

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