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Question
Posted by: Michelle | 2011/01/12

Bad habits

Hi there

My hubby''s son is 9 years old but he already wants to be his own person. He likes to gel his hair and dress himself...he uses slang when he is with his friends and when he is with his mother, he is in adult compnay....he told us that when he was with his mother on new years eve, about a year back..her friends were cheering her on to drink, he found that to be a laughing matter...

He acts like a teenager when he wants to and like a baby when he wants something...he addresses my hubby''''s friends by their first names and he like to listen to certain type of music as well...its clear to see that he is easily influenced and I am affraid that when he actually becomes a teenager, his school work will suffer...he is doing great in school but he is very lazy at home, if we dont tell him to do his homeowork..he wont do it.

He is easily distracted and watches a lot of tv, he likes to be around people that he knows he will get his way by.

He hangs around students who are older than him, but her says not all the time.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi Michelle,

Many children are displaying adolescent behaviour earlier, but to some extent this is dependent on what they are exposed to. Decisions in this regard are often up to parents to monitor, and in this case in both of the homes in which he stays. What would be beneficial if it is possible is for all involved in parenting him to discuss what they feel is appropriate or not, and overall what they feel is best for him at his age. Spending time with older children can inevitably lead to engaging in the activities of older children and adolescents, some of which is not appropriate for a 9 year old as they do not have the emotional maturity to deal with it.

I would recommend that you speak with your husband about meeting with his Mom to try and have consistent boundaries in both homes, ultimately this will be best for him and provide a level of emotional security.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: tina | 2011/02/10

advice on bad habits with teenagers not behaving propley

Reply to tina
Posted by: Teen expert | 2011/01/12

Hi Michelle,

Many children are displaying adolescent behaviour earlier, but to some extent this is dependent on what they are exposed to. Decisions in this regard are often up to parents to monitor, and in this case in both of the homes in which he stays. What would be beneficial if it is possible is for all involved in parenting him to discuss what they feel is appropriate or not, and overall what they feel is best for him at his age. Spending time with older children can inevitably lead to engaging in the activities of older children and adolescents, some of which is not appropriate for a 9 year old as they do not have the emotional maturity to deal with it.

I would recommend that you speak with your husband about meeting with his Mom to try and have consistent boundaries in both homes, ultimately this will be best for him and provide a level of emotional security.

Reply to Teen expert

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