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Question
Posted by: meena | 2009/10/27

Autocratic boss

Hi There,

I think I am losing my mind my boss is making my life a misery and its literally making me sick to my stomach when I think about it. She been the boss of everyone since end of last year and thats when my hell began. She is extremely moody and does not handle pressure well to the point that she takes it out on me and another girl we report directly to her who in turn takes it out on her daughter. we are both in situations where we can'  t leave it seems like this is been done to push us out.

One minute she'  s happy and actually greets us most of the time its dreadful.

She passes bitchy remarks about me being skinny or dressing nicely cos she has weight issues. She generally treats everyone badly especially the women i have never received such bad increases or bonuses in 7 yrs of working here- since she is around and when we stand up to her she takes it badly. I have been looking around for another job since she is in charge but nothing is comming up for me. We are miserable , not sleeping well , losing weight cos i can'  t even eatand i used to be confident and good at what i do now i find i am making mistakes thats she picks up on and nails me for. When bad situations out of my control happens i feel like ending my life just to get away from her.

Our co is very small and she is the most snr person in SA other directors o/seas adore her.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Isn't it sad how many companies seem to promote people to boss, without recognizing, before or afterwards, that they are both emotionally flawed, and incapable of the job.
An old guy I once met called Cecil Parkinson ( who wrote a brilliant book called Parkison's Law ) wrote that in time every job comes to be filled buy someone who can't do it. Because if you can do the job well, they promote you - until you reach your level of incompetence, where you cannot handle the job, and they can't think what else to do with you. And that's when the person becomes a misery to everyone else.
Her boss, and the HR dwept should have recognized this problem already, and should be working on a solution, including rescuing her staff from her.
Clearly her one skill is making her Director's adore her, and apparently they're stupid enough to take her at face value and not look at how she affects her staff.
Maybe it'd be worth chatting to a labour lawyer, as if he is making you miserable to push you to resogn, that;s called Constructive Dismissal, and is actually against the law.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Purple | 2009/10/27

HI,

If it gets to the point where you just can' t take it anymore and you leave and claim constructive dismissal - there are a few things that you have to prove.

Firstly, you need to show what you did to try and resolve the issues - so, did you speak to her and try to resolve it directly (suggest keeping notes of the meetings and e-mailing her to confirm what was agreed to) or did you follow the company' s formal grievance procedure.
As there is nobody above her, if speaking to her brings no joy, then you should contact her direct senior overseas.

Also, you need to show that what she was doing was genuinely intollerable and wasn' t just a subjective feeling.

It is extremely difficult to prove.

Bullying in offices is completely unacceptable, and these people were often bullies right from when they were children - bullies don' t just grow out of it.

Keep on looking for other work, check the paper on the day the weekly job supplement is published, register on a couple of on line sites, register with 3 - 5 agencies.

If you just can' t take it anymore and you end up walking out, then do approach the CCMA and claim constructive dismissal, but bear the above points in mind, and make sure you have kept dated records of what she did and when and what you did at the time to try to resolve things.
You can also register with an agency to temp while you continue to look for work. Just a hint - the bigger agencies tend to find you work more regularly.

Reply to Purple
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009/10/27

Isn't it sad how many companies seem to promote people to boss, without recognizing, before or afterwards, that they are both emotionally flawed, and incapable of the job.
An old guy I once met called Cecil Parkinson ( who wrote a brilliant book called Parkison's Law ) wrote that in time every job comes to be filled buy someone who can't do it. Because if you can do the job well, they promote you - until you reach your level of incompetence, where you cannot handle the job, and they can't think what else to do with you. And that's when the person becomes a misery to everyone else.
Her boss, and the HR dwept should have recognized this problem already, and should be working on a solution, including rescuing her staff from her.
Clearly her one skill is making her Director's adore her, and apparently they're stupid enough to take her at face value and not look at how she affects her staff.
Maybe it'd be worth chatting to a labour lawyer, as if he is making you miserable to push you to resogn, that;s called Constructive Dismissal, and is actually against the law.

Reply to cybershrink

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