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Question
Posted by: piggy | 2012/03/22

asb help ,lus weg

hi ek het hulp nodig asb ,
ek is 24 en my man 27 en is so vier jaar getroud . HHet 2 kids

My lus vir seks is heeltemal weg . Ons baklei deedae baie daoor , aan diee begin ek ek hom deur die nag wakker gemaak ens .

Ek het seker 4 jaar laas uit my eie aanduiding gegee dat ek lus is .

As hynievra en smeek nie sal ek nie gee nie , ek net nie lus nie .

Ek is bang dat my huwelik nie gaan hou nie , want daar altyd daardie aspek .

Wat kan ek doen om weer reg te kom ? ek het nie stress ens nie /
My libido is net weg na die eerstte kind ?

Is daar nie veilige bekostigbare produkte wat ek kan gebruik nie ?

asb help my

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It often happens that there is a decrease in libido after the birth of the children – somehow nature’s way to focus the attention initially on the baby and the baby’s needs. However if it persists it is important to address – as it seems to be the case in your situation. Lack of understanding how men and women respond to and approach sex differently and knowing how to integrate and accommodate it in the relationship often escalates in arguments and frustration as described by you. I would recommend that you seek professional guidance to overcome and resolve the misunderstandings; arguments and assist you to integrate one another’s differences and to find ways to accommodate he differences. Lack of sexual desire often has an underling emotional/communication and appreciation element and it only becomes visible in change in sexual behavior and needs. Before rushing to look for medicine to address the matter – it is more crucial to address the factors that led to the lack of sexual interest and address that as that will have a longer and more sustainable impact.
For further information please consult SASHA’s website at www.sexualhealth.qw.co.za/dru. For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lee | 2012/03/26

Agge nooit JA! Ek het seks met my man omdat ek LUS is vir hom! Natuurlik is ek ook lief vir hom, maar hemeltjie, ons het almal hormone.. En ek het ook 2 kids al, so dis geen verskoning.

Reply to Lee
Posted by: jA | 2012/03/24

Piggy jammer om jou mee tedeel maar ons is nie diere nie ons raak nie deur hormone gedryf nie, jy wil seks he met jou man omdat jy vir hom lief is en omdat jy jou liggaam met hom wil deel nie omdat jy lus is nie.Toe jy n kind gehad het het die effek wat hormone gehad het heeltemal weggeval.

Reply to jA
Posted by: alice | 2012/03/23

Ek het ook na die geboorte van my kind anders begin voel - jy voel dan 1ste n ma!!!
Partykeer is dit ook seer en voel mens ongemaklik in jou lyf met die ekstra vetjies wat nie wil weggaan nie.
Ek het iewers gehoor dat die beste present wat ouers vir hul kinders kan gee is om mekaar lief te hê .... hierdie liefde sluit seks in.

My raad - eerstens moet jy jouself weer as n seksuele wese sien. Gaan koop vir jou self sexy onderklere. Trek dit op n gewone dag aan. Jy gaan heeltyd daarvan bewus wees, of ten minste wanneer jy badkamer toe gaan. Probeer kant en satyn. Probeer onthou wat van seks vir jou lekker was 4 jaar gelede.

Dan reel jy n babysitter - of as jy verkies om by die huis te wees en jou kinders slaap redelik goed, sit hul in die bed.

Steek kerse op, maak n bottel wyn oop en gaan gee hom n soen met net jou nuwe onderklere en n paar hoë  hak skoene aan.
Of gee hom n bottel lyfroom en vra hom om jou te massage.

Hy behoort opgewonde genoeg te wees. Jy gaan moet probeer om nie aan die kinders te dink nie maar aan jou man! (dis hoekom babysitter beter is - of hulle by ouma te gaan aflaai)

Ek dink as jy dit eers een keer gedoen het gaan jy sien hoe begeerlik jou man jou vind en jy gaan sommer meer sesueel voel.

Sterkte...... NEE..... GENIET DIT!





Reply to alice
Posted by: diana | 2012/03/23

ja dis erg , ek hoop iemand kan jou goeie raad gee !

Jy weet wat volg as jy nie oor die probleem kom nie , jou man gaan liefde en aandag op ander plek soek .

ek hoop regtig iemand kan jou help , ek weet van mense wat geskei het 2 jaar na hulle getroud is omdat daar so probleem was .
Ek het al gehoor van libido enhacers vir vrouens maar ek weet nie of dit langtemyn oplosing is nie , en as jy eers begin met dit moet jy dit seker vir altyd gebruik ?

Reply to diana
Posted by: Sexologist | 2012/03/23

It often happens that there is a decrease in libido after the birth of the children – somehow nature’s way to focus the attention initially on the baby and the baby’s needs. However if it persists it is important to address – as it seems to be the case in your situation. Lack of understanding how men and women respond to and approach sex differently and knowing how to integrate and accommodate it in the relationship often escalates in arguments and frustration as described by you. I would recommend that you seek professional guidance to overcome and resolve the misunderstandings; arguments and assist you to integrate one another’s differences and to find ways to accommodate he differences. Lack of sexual desire often has an underling emotional/communication and appreciation element and it only becomes visible in change in sexual behavior and needs. Before rushing to look for medicine to address the matter – it is more crucial to address the factors that led to the lack of sexual interest and address that as that will have a longer and more sustainable impact.
For further information please consult SASHA’s website at www.sexualhealth.qw.co.za/dru. For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com.

Reply to Sexologist
Posted by: BASSIE | 2012/03/22

Dis maklik, maak jou bene wyyyyd oop en speel saam, toe man. Of doen hy dit dalk nie reg nie....

Reply to BASSIE

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