advertisement
Question
Posted by: Inga | 2008/09/10

anxiety

My husband and I recently divorced due to an affair he had, I was willing to forgive but he wanted out..this was in December 2007. He left to move in with her.. 3 weeks ago he came back apologising whole heartedly and saying he has realised he made the biggest mistake of his life (midlife crises and all that, he is 51) and still loves me and begged for forgiveness. He is really a good man and this was a first bad slip up on his side so I decided to give us another chance.(I still love him). I am glad to have him back but I' m constantly having mild anxiety attacks (flushing, rapid heart beat, nausia, lump in throat etc), my doctor has given me tranquilizers to help which are inclined to make me a bit drowzy and really don' t like the feeling but at least it controls the feelings of anxiety, do I just keep taking them (1 month' s supply) ?..what I want to know is will this anxiety eventually subside on it' s own with time? Is this happening because all this " come back " of his after 8 months was so sudden and unexpected.?.. I was totaly heartbroken when he left and was still trying to get over all the heartbreak when he came back... He is trying very hard to make right the wrong he did.. why am I still having this feeling of anxiety all the time?

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I think your anxiety would be better dealt with in counselling, perhaps CBT-style personal counselling --- but maybe marriage counselling for the pair of you would be the best setting within which to try to heal the relationship and reduce the sources of your anxiety. You are reacting to the unexpected parting and then the unexpected return, and the uncertainty this has created.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

5
Our users say:
Posted by: Inga | 2008/09/10

Dear Mel... thanks.

Reply to Inga
Posted by: Inga | 2008/09/10

Dear Case, I hear what you say... I have learnt nothing in life has a guarantee...sometimes one just has to take the chance..

Reply to Inga
Posted by: Mel | 2008/09/10

Hi Case
There are no guarantees and securities in life. Things are what you make it. Maybe her husband has learned his lesson, people make mistakes. Perhaps he has suffered just as much. Don' t you think it would have been much easier for him to just walk away and start again. He has chosen to try again and it will be a lot harder. Good luck Inga, I am sure if you are able to work through this your marriage will get to a new, good place.

Reply to Mel
Posted by: case | 2008/09/10

Nothing will ever make it right for what he did wrong. He cheated on you once, what security do you have that it won' t happen again?

Reply to case
Posted by: Mel | 2008/09/10

Hi Inga
I think that it is extremely important for both you and your husband to go for couples counselling. The counselling will at least help you deal with all the stress you have been through.

Reply to Mel

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement