Our expert says:
He may indeed have had unhappy and frustrating experiences in SA ( though he may have found things similarly discouraging in his own country in recent years --- and many foreigners are in this country precisely bcause they had grown discouraged with their home country ) ; and many South Africans have similar feelings about the areas of chaos in their country. But he needs to recognize that by taking an embittered and combative approach, he is most probably making things worse for himself, as well as, obviously, you.
While a good couple happen to make each other happy, the relationship has gone sour when the husband assumes it is the wife's primary job to make him happy, and ignores his own duty to help her to be happy. IT sounds as though he is coping really badly with stress, and would benefit from seeing a shrink for an assessment ( there could be a Depression or Anxiety Disorder needing and benefitting from treatment ) and a counsellor, to develop better ways of handling all that is troubling him.
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