Posted by: bog bog | 2009-03-05


I unfortunately lost my husband over a year ago, he left me with a son of 3 and a daughter of 7. I then met a lovely guy in December, we have been seeing each other for 4 months now. He lost his wife 2 years ago and has a son of 23. So we have both lost someone and have the same back ground.

I didnt think i would fall in love again but I have and think fallen hard. He stays over at my house every night but goes home the next morning, so he hasnt moved in.

I just feel i want more, like for us to move in together. We havent said the I LOVE YOU yet, as much i want to, i am scared i am going to chase him away. How would i know if he felt the same way? I have so many emotions and thoughts going through my head....... I also think that my son is alot to handle and for him to get used to. So if i thought he wanted us to move in together i think the children aspect might be putting him off. How and what do i do?

Am i being silly? Should i say nothing about they way i feel and not say anything about moving in together??? Please help need an "  outsiders"  perspective......

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Our expert says:
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Have you tried simply talking this over with him, calmly, about your hopes and fears, your cautions and concerns, and your curiousity about how he feels ? He might be feeling similarly inclined but similar cautious about saying anything about it. He sounds like a good guy, nd so there's probably no great hurry, and if he's as good as he seems, he wouldn't be too easily frightened off, either.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Bogbog | 2009-03-05

Thank you very much for your kind words........ Its amazing how you have made me think even further........ I think people get involved in their own little worlds then and forget about everyone and everything else that matters.

I dont know who you are but you sound like a very special person

Reply to Bogbog
Posted by: leeloo | 2009-03-05

take your time. you are lonely and need someone. we all do. but your children need you. he may be a great guy and all that but those two kids have lost a dad and need all the stability they can get, not a new dad.

what i mean is...just let things take their course. dont expect anything in any sense. just enjoy your time together and make sure the kids are happy. the rest will work out fine. that is how life is if you dont chase it.

just remember, 2 little people need you to be stable, happy and always a foundation for them. love yourself and everything around you will love you back.

Reply to leeloo

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