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Question
Posted by: Alex | 2010/09/29

Am i going crazy?

I sont know if i am going crazy or being totally irrational, the reason being, I have been dating my boyfriend for two years. he recently started working with a female friend, they have been friends prior to them working together. i never had a problem with trhis before.
Since they have been working together, they travel to and from work together, and spend ther lunch breaks together. She is also part of our" clan"  so she is also spends the weekends with us.
I cant help but think that they will start liking each other.
I am feeling so out of the picture now, its as if i have been replaced.
I only get to see him on the weekends.
Am i crazy?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Having been friends for so long, surely they DO like each other ( you don't mention whether You like Her )- but that's what friends do. This doesn't mean there's automatically anyhing to do with love or sex involved. That goes way beyond "liking".
Also, I assume that all along you and he tended to get together during the weekends - it doesn't sound as though you are seeing less of him, just that, because of their working together, she may see more of him. Why not just calmly discuss this with him, saying that you feel a bit uneasy, and see what he thinks and says ?

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Soul | 2010/09/29

I see where your coming from and it''s understanable. I would be just as concerned.
Since she''s working with your bf why is it that she must spend weekends with you to, that''s not healthy for your relationship . personally I would put a stop to it. I don''t think your going crazy, having said that just remember that you are his place away from all the chaos and he can relax with you. If you going to speak to him about it handle it very carefully on a casual note don''t come across as being jealous and clingy you''ll just push him away. But also mention that he sees her during the week and you feel you folks need alone time together.

Reply to Soul
Posted by: Alex | 2010/09/29

I did like her, before we started seeing her on weekends as well, we dont have any alone time anymore, because she is always there. prior to her working there we used to see each other during the week as well, because he has to take her home, we do not see each other.
I feel as though she is a replacement to me because she is there every single day, whereas i am there for the weekend-where she is there as well.

Reply to Alex
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/29

Having been friends for so long, surely they DO like each other ( you don't mention whether You like Her )- but that's what friends do. This doesn't mean there's automatically anyhing to do with love or sex involved. That goes way beyond "liking".
Also, I assume that all along you and he tended to get together during the weekends - it doesn't sound as though you are seeing less of him, just that, because of their working together, she may see more of him. Why not just calmly discuss this with him, saying that you feel a bit uneasy, and see what he thinks and says ?

Reply to cybershrink

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