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Question
Posted by: Ice-queen | 2010-09-30

Am I Cold?

I''ve been wondering why I do not feel sorry for homeless people or the beggers on the street and why other people feel so terribly sorry for them.
I totally hate them asking me for money!
I work hard for what I earn and its not alot and I also look after my 2 younger siblings and sometimes on the very rare occasion I do have some left over to spoil myself and them.
The thing is when I''m out and they ask me for money I can easily say not and not feel abit sorry for them, I''l shoo them away and the thing I hate the most is when we eat out when you get out they all on you , with their sad faces asking you for money as if you owe them for having just had a nice meal.
All they do with the money is buy them glue/drugs and drink in anycase.
There are places of safety for them where they will get food, shelter and clothes and be empowered but they do not want to be there, so if thats their choice then live with it!
My bf or friends always give them money or their food and they always say I cannot be so cold hearted and that what they do with the money is not for us to judge but God knows you had good intentions.
I don''t even feel sorry for the little kids even though I know they not to blame for where they are.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

A friend o mine, who also worries that too often the money you give goes on glue or drugs or alcohol - or to an entrepreneurs who takes mosy of what they collect for him - has a policy that she will talk to the person, and if they are hungry, she will rather go with them to a shop and buy them some food. Genuine ones appreciate this.
Maybe on a broader scale you should consider becoming more politically active to push the municipalities to stop waisting our money on themselves, and do more to help those genuinely in need ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Zee | 2010-10-01

The problem, if you give them money, they will never go out and TRY get a job. It will be easy money. Yes, I give to the ones who ask can they wash my car etc. and come around asking to clean the garden. But the ones standing on the road, and 95% of the time, they are young enough and able to go work. I feel really sorry for the disabled ones thou. But what really makes me tick, is those mothers sitting in the blazing sun with the kids, using them to make us feel sorry. I was so joyed when the cops said they would start taking them away from their mothers and off the streets. That lasted a few weeks. I am non-white myself, but isnt it amazing how its the whites that give the most to them. I hardly if ever seen a black give another black on the street money. Can I ask why?

Reply to Zee
Posted by: Liza | 2010-10-01

I''ve been there - lost everything because I had severe bipolar. Did I go stand at a robot to beg? NO! I went and got a minimum wage job as well as making and selling stuff for an extra income. This is actually the reason why I don''t give to beggars anymore - I''ve been in their shoes and pulled myself up from nothing. If I can do it, then so can others!

Reply to Liza
Posted by: Good for u | 2010-10-01

True Lizard, and for u who didnt vote this government who cared real.. U do know that u have an option of leaving this country! Funny how people are so quick to think that those material things/money they have can never be taken away from them one.. This is life anything is possible.

Reply to Good for u
Posted by: lizard | 2010-09-30

I have R2-00 coins, when I have given out say 5 R2-00 coins for the day I stop and then carry on the next day, it does''nt bother me as I would like to save the whole bloody world if I could. When i''ve got I give when I have''nt I cant, I just tell them sorry, cause what else can one do, but I allways thank God i am not them, and I thank God that he has had mercy and spared me and I am very greatful for everything I have, poverty is all over the world, its very sad realy

Reply to lizard
Posted by: Soul | 2010-09-30

I agree with you. I know it sounds nasty but I''m being honest. I will admit however that when the festive season is here i do give but only to the elderly who I know are to old to get employed. As for the young ones they can get off their lazy butts and get a job.

Reply to Soul
Posted by: Happiness | 2010-09-30

Even if we were to give them money on a regular basis, the question is for how long? One person who also used to stay on the streets confirmed that giving them money is the worst thing you can do for them. Because in short what you are saying to them is " stay where you are and don''t do anything about your situation, I''ll take care of you." 

Reply to Happiness
Posted by: Noddy | 2010-09-30

I also can''t stand it - it just gets too much - everywhere you go there is always someone asking for money - drives me NUTS.

Reply to Noddy
Posted by: Liza | 2010-09-30

I guess I''m an ice queen too then. I never give beggars a cent. If I can work for my money, then so can they! My taxes are supposed to be partially used to fund half-way houses and empowerment projects for the unemployed, so why should I give more? It is the responsibility of the government to take care of these people. The fact that the money actually goes into the pocket of some tenderpreneur who has political contacts is NOT MY PROBLEM. I didn''t vote for this government, so I refuse to take responsibility for their bugger-ups!

Reply to Liza
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-09-30

A friend o mine, who also worries that too often the money you give goes on glue or drugs or alcohol - or to an entrepreneurs who takes mosy of what they collect for him - has a policy that she will talk to the person, and if they are hungry, she will rather go with them to a shop and buy them some food. Genuine ones appreciate this.
Maybe on a broader scale you should consider becoming more politically active to push the municipalities to stop waisting our money on themselves, and do more to help those genuinely in need ?

Reply to cybershrink

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