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Question
Posted by: Nikie | 2012/04/19

Am I being unreasonable

Good day Doc

I''ve just recently met this guy and we''ve just clicked/connected, we started by chatting over the phone and i did ask him if he is still together with the mother of his 2 kids and he said NO...now yesterday after we had a lovely weekend together he confessed that he lied abt the mother of his kids,they''re actually still together. I got so angry because i felt like he lied to get to my pants. He''s apologising,but my question is how am i supposed to trust anything he says in future and he keeps on telling me that " we should be matured about the situation and move on"  i mean,is he really expecting me to just carry on as if nothing happened, am I really being unreasonable???

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Clicking is very grely over-rated.
He is cheating on the mother of his 2 kids, with you, and maybe with others ( you know he is a liar, so you don't know what is true and what isn't ). What does his apology mean ? That now he's got into your pants, he doesn't expect to need to lie to you again ? Or he won't lie to you - until the next time it seems experdient ?
What on earth does he mean about "being mature" about cheating on both of you ?
You were being unreasonable in getting involved with this rat from the start, and in remaining involved with him. Why on earth do you hesitate about leaving him ?
Anon is reading things into your story which you didn't actually say, and which might not be a valid part of it.

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4
Our users say:
Posted by: Liza | 2012/04/20

There is definitely nothing mature about lying and then trying to play the ''you''re being childish'' card. He lied to get into your pants. Plain and simple. That is a fact - not an opinion as he would have you believe. Run girl - this guy is definitely not worth the effort or eventual heartbreak. Cut all ties and find someone who actually deserves you.

Good Luck
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/04/20

Clicking is very grely over-rated.
He is cheating on the mother of his 2 kids, with you, and maybe with others ( you know he is a liar, so you don't know what is true and what isn't ). What does his apology mean ? That now he's got into your pants, he doesn't expect to need to lie to you again ? Or he won't lie to you - until the next time it seems experdient ?
What on earth does he mean about "being mature" about cheating on both of you ?
You were being unreasonable in getting involved with this rat from the start, and in remaining involved with him. Why on earth do you hesitate about leaving him ?
Anon is reading things into your story which you didn't actually say, and which might not be a valid part of it.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Anon | 2012/04/19

No, your not being unreasonable. You got involved with him thinking that he is single which you now know he isn''t. He tricked you into something that you would not have done if you had known about his girlfriend/wife and undermined your morals (I''m assuming that if they have 2 kids they are in some form of a commited relationship and that you aren''t keen on cheaters).

And the answer is that you SHOULDN''T trust another word he says, actually the easiest would be to not speak to him again at all, then you can be 100% sure that he cannot lie to you again. It''s funny that he is the one telling you to be mature about it when clearly he lacks maturity himself.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Maria | 2012/04/19

I''m confused by the fact that you seem to still consider a future for this relationship? Run. This guy is cheating on his current girlfriend with you, what makes you think he will treat you even different?

Reply to Maria

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