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Question
Posted by: Lee | 2011-08-29

Am I being selfish?

I broke up with my boyfriend 2 years ago after we had been dating for 6 years and we were about to get engaged. He hurt me really bad. He immediately started dating someone and they are still together. I had 2 bad relationships and am now single. He invited me to a family event on Saturday. The girlfriend was there even though the family we happy to see me and introduced me as their ''daughter in law.'' My boyfriend looked very good and feelings of regret started flooding in and think I might have made a mistake breaking up with him.

We made a promise to each other that if we both turn 30 and still single, we just going to marry each other. That''s 8 months away and want this to happen now. What if within the 8 months the girlfriend falls pregnant or they get engaged?

Should I bring up the subject and see what he says. If he agrees, he would hurt an innocent woman.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If he was able to immediately form a new and lasting relationship, he was clearly not very closely ond of you, was he ? Whether the new gf falls pregnant is something the pair of them can easily arrange or avoid. The hokey idea of "we'll marry at 30, if neither of us have found anyone better" is an old movie plot, and somewhat insulting to both of you

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Our users say:
Posted by: Hard Facts | 2011-08-29

You are being incredibly selfish and immature.
Who makes a pact to settle for second best because you cannot find a person who would be your first choice? You will not find a partner by hanging out with him, his girlfriend and his family. Truth is right, get into the real world and stop living in fantasy land!

Reply to Hard Facts
Posted by: Truth | 2011-08-29

You are living in cloud coukoo land!
What if she gets pregnant or thy become engaged? are you mad? He is not with you out of choice,do not bring the subject up with him - he is with someone else.
As for calling you their daughter in law..this is insulting to his chosen girlfriend.
Break all contact with him and move on.................

Reply to Truth
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-08-29

If he was able to immediately form a new and lasting relationship, he was clearly not very closely ond of you, was he ? Whether the new gf falls pregnant is something the pair of them can easily arrange or avoid. The hokey idea of "we'll marry at 30, if neither of us have found anyone better" is an old movie plot, and somewhat insulting to both of you

Reply to cybershrink

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