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Question
Posted by: Just ranting | 2012-10-19

Also having in law troubles

Hi CS,

I just want to rant a little to get this off my chest, hope you don''t mind. My in laws live in the same town as I do and show no interest whatsoever towards their grand children. I ask them to baby sit about 3 times a year. The last time was for 2 hours from 6-8pm, which I don''t think was too hectic as the children went to sleep at 7pm. I have asked that they baby sit for another 3 hours this weekend but get this sigh when I ask. I have helped the in laws on many occasions and thought this one favour might just be honoured.

Am I being selfish by asking for this small favour?

Is it an effort to be with family, for some people?


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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its really unusual for in-laws / grandpareemts, not to show interest in their grandchildren ( one wonders how much real interest they showed in their own children ? ) Usually its more fun as grandparents can enjoy the kids and then GIVE THEM BACK to the parents. Have you gently asked them why it seems to trouble them to babysit even for a short time ? Of course you're not being selfish to ask them. Hopw does your spouse, whose parents these people are, see this ?

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: DEE | 2012-10-23

I have twin boys, that were born very premature &  had a long stay in hospital. You would think that my mother would love to babysit when I go to them. They live in another city. We have visited a few times for a few days. My mum has no time for babysitting &  doesn''t have the patience.. She has never even changed their nappies on any of these visits. The last time we were down, I asked her to give the babies a bath. Well it never happened. She said she will do it after cooking, but then she was on the phone, etc.

Reply to DEE
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012-10-20

Its really unusual for in-laws / grandpareemts, not to show interest in their grandchildren ( one wonders how much real interest they showed in their own children ? ) Usually its more fun as grandparents can enjoy the kids and then GIVE THEM BACK to the parents. Have you gently asked them why it seems to trouble them to babysit even for a short time ? Of course you're not being selfish to ask them. Hopw does your spouse, whose parents these people are, see this ?

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Chris758 | 2012-10-19

They should be honoured to watch the children!!! They do not know how lucky they are to have their grand children here. Mine lives overseas and I would give anything to look after them and to cuddle them!!!

Reply to Chris758

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