Posted by: lena | 2011-09-01

Alcoholic husband

Hi, I have been married to my husband for 6 years  he started drinking heavily after 1 1/2 years of marriage. He went through rehabs and after a long road stayed sober for 3 years. He has recently started drinking again and in this relapse not only destroyed the car, lost his job and went to rehab again. I am totally devastated  we have two very small daughters and are seriously considering divorce. He can get a new job now and wants me to quite my job and move with him across the country to a town I really do not want to live or raise my kids in. With an alcoholic there is no guarantee that they will stay sober .Am I selfish for not wanting to pack up and go with him?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageDivorce support expert

Dear Lena,

It is never selfish to think of one's well being and your children.
There are never any guarantees, in any kind of relationships, but relationships that have already provided obstacles are harder to keep moving forward.
Some challenged relationships survive the many obstacles that they have to overcome, allowing them to grow in strength and gratitude, but one has to do so realistically which you are doing.
Listen to your gut feeling, your voice of reason. Only you knows what is best for you and your children.

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