Our expert says:
Gosh, she took rather a long time to decide she was lesbian. Presumably, as you say your sex life with her was good, she is perhaps bisexual.
Divorce sounds like a sensible option, and you'll need good legal advice, of course. A shrink, in such situations, usually would not tell you what to do - you have to make your own decisions He might guide you by asking a number of pertinent questions, explore with you the consequences of various options, and so on. But our aim would be to help you make good decisions, rather than to make them for you.
The behaviour you describe sounds like someone old enough to know better, behaving foolishly and potentially self-destructively, and not considering the consequences for herself and others. And that works fine so long as someone else pays all the bills. It wouldn't seem half as much fun if the money was running out. At least stop her spending a cent more of your money on this foolishness ( you are under no obligation to sponsor it ) YOu don't say what profession she belongs to, but at the least her practice of whatever it is will surely suffer if she continues behaving in this way.
Behaving as irresponsibly as this ( especially if you can get evidence of this ) and making no provision for the children to stay with her, and refusing to pay her share of their reasonable expenses, would surely enable you to fight vigorously to get custody of the children, for their own benefit.
How can her legal rep be someone who was disbarred ? Or has he been re-admitted to practice ?
It sounds as though yo have done your best to persuade her to change her mind, and you can't take responsibility for this - she has the right to be foolish. But not at your expense, or that of the children. And its likely that the harder you try to persuade her that these plans are daft, the more firmly she will stick to them.
LOok after yourself and the children, get the court to refuse her custody and to require her to pay appropriate maintenance, based on her normal earnings, not on any depleted sum she chooses to earn now when it suits her.
The only realistic chance she might eventually change her mind is if she goes ahead as she plans, and finds it much less satisfying than she is assuming.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.