Posted by: Team | 2008-12-03

Affair at work

I had an affair going at work for two years. One Monday morning the person I had the affair with said to me she decided that her kids were the most important thing in her life and that she would like to end the affair as she thought this would be the best for them. After this she frequently came on to me and I figured out that when she has a bad day at home she longs for the attention I used to give her.I love her very much and now after a year I still can' t forget about her. We still work together and although we are not in a affair any longer we are still very close. You could say we only stopped the intimate side of the affair.
About 9 months ago we got a new boss and she is very friendly with him. The same way she was with me when we had the affair.I confronted her with the " evidence"  I had and she denied averything. They are only friends. Friends which e-mail each other at 9 o clock on a Saturday night while he is away on leave?
I tried to get a new job but so far without success. I am now at a point where everything they do is suspicious and although I have tried to " walk away"  from her I just couldn' t. She is the most loving woman I have ever met and was the time with her the most fulfilling I have ever had with anybody.I need help on how to handle the situation at work. Should I just sit back and see what happens? It is affecting my health. Mental and physical. We are all married.

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I agree with CV. DO you really expect anyone's sympathy for this selfish affair of two very selfish people ? If she craved more attention, she should have engaged in marriage counselling and found what she needed within her own marriage, not within yours. Possibly, her desire for "attention" is insatiable, and just as she got it from you, now she gets it from the new boss, and he won't be the last source, either. What she is doing is manipulative, not loving. Taht you consider her so marvellously loving, proves that it is successfully manipulative.
And for yourself, get into mariage counselling with yoru own wife, and heal your own marriage. The fact that your long self-pitying story nowhere mentions her or shows any sympathy for her, is highly significant

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: hopeless | 2008-12-03

why the hell do you get married in the first place if you cant keep it in your pants. how do you look at your wife at night when u get home. you trully are hopeless and a sad sorry to be hush but just the fact that you dont mention anything about your wife and that you are feeling jealous that your married mistress is busy with your boss is just very very said. i feel said for you, honestly. you need help.

Reply to hopeless
Posted by: Easy | 2008-12-03

I think we should all be a little less judgemental here. WOW!! Nasty comments. Look, you obviously don' t care for your wife and have become obsessed with this woman which you now don' t seem to be able to have. She clearly isn' t that interested in you or a serious relationship and I would suggest that you see a psychologist to help you move on and do the right things at this point in time. Good luck.

Reply to Easy
Posted by: Sally | 2008-12-03

All I can say is karma will have the final say - both of you are inconsiderate and disgusting! I hate cheaters!

Reply to Sally
Posted by: Wife | 2008-12-03

Youre a whipped stupid man bitch and she' s a slut, is all I can say

Reply to Wife
Posted by: anon | 2008-12-03

Hey it can happen to anyone, Ultimaytely all good games end in tears, if you are so unhappy at home look at a divorce then you can screw around as much as you like,

Often the excitement of an affiar is overwhelming and one cannot stop try and keep your kids in mind as they need a role model.

Reply to anon
Posted by: Anon2 | 2008-12-03

Oh BOOHOOO!!!!! Poor you!!!!!

What about your wife?!?! It' s people like you who deserve to get what' s coming to you! I HOPE your wife leaves you and you' re lonely for the REST of your life!!

Reply to Anon2
Posted by: Anon | 2008-12-03

Damn bastard!

Reply to Anon
Posted by: CV | 2008-12-03


Reply to CV

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.