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Question
Posted by: Girl | 2010/08/23

Advice please

HI there
Just need some advice - how do I just let go!? I have such an amazingly blessed life, a husband I love with all my heart and nothing to really worry about except I cant control my thoughts!!! I would convince myself that someting is wrong with me, that I dont love my husband enough that I am not over my ex boyfriend (who I havent seen in more than 5 years and have absolutely no need or want to ever see or hear from him again) but then things remind me of him and I feel guilty (I shouldnt be thinking of him) or I convince myself that I dont deserve this happiness because of him. It just all feels so jumbled up in my brain. I remind myself that I cant be happy before I sort out this problem and I personally think it has nothing to do with my ex but everything to do with the fact that I am a perfectionist and feel like I cant forgive myself for allowing someone to hurt me so badly? Sometimes I worry that I have depression but I laugh and love and enjoy life and love food etc I just want to feel calm and relaxed and just live in the moment. *sigh* any advice please?

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Our expert says:
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Dear "Girl"

You seem quite desperate in that you have it all except it seems too slip thru your hands?

You asked: "how do I just let go!?" If you feel jumbled up in my brain, it seems you need to learn some psychological or emotional coping skills. by attending neuro/biofeedback training, mindfulness or find some more activities that engage "RR" you will find these skills easily and effectively.

If you are concerned about depression a skilled HCP is the best place to go asap.

Warmest,
Justin

Dr Justin J. Kennedy
B.Soc.Sci; MSBC; PhD

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Stress Reduction Expert | 2010/08/26

Dear "Girl"

You seem quite desperate in that you have it all except it seems too slip thru your hands?

You asked: "how do I just let go!?" If you feel jumbled up in my brain, it seems you need to learn some psychological or emotional coping skills. by attending neuro/biofeedback training, mindfulness or find some more activities that engage "RR" you will find these skills easily and effectively.

If you are concerned about depression a skilled HCP is the best place to go asap.

Warmest,
Justin

Dr Justin J. Kennedy
B.Soc.Sci; MSBC; PhD

Reply to Stress Reduction Expert

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