Our expert says:
Abuse, whether physical or psychological or both, is never acceptable, and to threaten to stab someone with a knife is in itself a crime. From your description there is definitely something wrong with your husband, though from this distance we can't guess what - he may be becoming mentally ill, or under the influence of drugs, or otherwise becoming more unstable.
And what on earth does he want ? He seems upset if you do confront him about his cheating, and then you say he was upset because you DIDN'T confront him about it ? And why would the other woman contact you ? What did she want to achieve ?
The first priority must be to ensure the safety of yourself and the children. Call POWA and/or some similar group that advises abused women, for advice on how to safely leave this dangerous person and to keep yourself and your children safe.
Don't try to persuade him to leave you - get yourself to a safe place, then get good legal advice to go further towards perhaps divorcing him, and getting a court order to forbid him to threaten or approach you or the children at any time or in any way.
Its nonsense, of course, for him to talk about how happy men with two wives must be, when he doesn't even know how to treat one woman and one wife with respect.
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