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Question
Posted by: john | 2010/07/15

advice

My girlfriend and i are of two differing religions(im muslim,she hindu).We decided to tell our parents recently about us.My parents are refusing and her parents are not to keen.I have listen to the arguments my parents have made against it.Im not sure but i do agree with a lot that they said about religion.I need advise on what to do.What ever decision i do make i want to make it soon.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

As you realize, other people cannot make up your minds for you. There are usually real problems arising in marriages or close relationships between people of different religions and/or cultures, mainly due to the prejudices of others. But some such relationships are particularly loving, lasting and happy. Some are not. It is wise for such a couple to work with a couples counsellor to explore the situation and at least to understand the potential problems and assess how prepared they are to deal with these

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Our users say:
Posted by: Love | 2010/07/19

If you love each other then focus on that. Ask her if she is willing to convert and practice your religion. If so then discuss that with your parents. Happiness and Love do not come knocking on your door every day so if you love her and she loves you then trust that and have faith. The two of you will move mountains.

Reply to Love
Posted by: Happiness | 2010/07/15

So what kind of religion are you going to practice in your house? Whatever decision you make must accomodate both of you equally. No partner must compromise because you''ll risk resentment as time goes.

Reply to Happiness
Posted by: ANon | 2010/07/15

Yes, religion shouldn''t matter, but it could be your folks are concerned at what could happen if you had kids and then it would be difficult to decide on a religion for them to folow. For some people it is easy to have the kids try both religions, but for some this can be challenging - and probably concernes your folks as they fear it could cause confusion for the potential children. Maybe you &  your partner need to sit down with your respective families and find out exactky what they aren''t happy about - perhaps some of their concerns are valid and some aren''t. Then, you can address the valid concerns, maybe with couple therapy, and reassure them about the ones that aren''t valid?

Reply to ANon
Posted by: me | 2010/07/15

Personally I don''t beleive any religion has any right to determine who you should marry, who are you marrying the person or the religion, in reality it can be a big issue and cause major family issues. No religion is better than another

Reply to me
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/07/15

As you realize, other people cannot make up your minds for you. There are usually real problems arising in marriages or close relationships between people of different religions and/or cultures, mainly due to the prejudices of others. But some such relationships are particularly loving, lasting and happy. Some are not. It is wise for such a couple to work with a couples counsellor to explore the situation and at least to understand the potential problems and assess how prepared they are to deal with these

Reply to cybershrink

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